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[Bison]

Well, this LP will soon be rejected. 

 

Riperino in piecerionos

[Dobby]

At least I know what happened to me.

[Bison]

I could've died of rabies. I will never know

[Johnnie Walker]

No it's just that this LSD trip is up and it's time for a new one.

 

Get ready to get back in character. Only awareness makes reality.

[A Crusty Knight Of Colour]

Well, this LP will soon be rejected.

Riperino in piecerionos

Chapter 25:

As E-Ro, Johnnie Walker, Despair Demon and mybudgee make their way back to town, they ponder over what to do next.


"What now, guys?"


"I... need some time alone."

As Walker leaves and heads towards the Graveyard, E-Ro turns his attention to Despair Demon and mybudgee. Despair Demon being insistent on visiting the brothel.


"Screw you, I'm not paying for your hookers."


"OneWeekOfHookersOneWeekOfHookersOneWeekOfHookers..."


"But we drew even, you didn't wi-"


"OneWeekOfHookersOneWeekOfHookersONEWEEKOFHOOKERS!ONEWEEKOFHOOKERS!!

E-Ro sighs and leaves the two men to their business. Some quiet prayer in the Abbey would do this Crusader some good.

As he steps into the building, he's greeted with furious argument.


"Hah! Now that Galactic Runner has mysteriously disappeared and pulled out of the race, I'm the clear front-runner now! I devote my inevitable victory to the God-Emperor, the Emperor of Man!"


"If you think I'm going to give up or that Runner will give up, you've got another thing coming. You spout your little lectures about your Emperor and your Imperium but you organics have more weaknesses than I can count. You aren't fit to become President! I am the only sane choice!"


"I am going to prove my superiority as a candidate to the BSN! I'm going to kill another Hag. Not the same one as last time, but I'm sure to win the people over."


"No you won't. Not if I kill her first. Damn SJWs cramping my style. Get the others, we're going Hag hunting."

The two continue to argue as they leave the Abbey. Rounding up Rah from the Tavern and dropping by the Sanitarium to drag an unwilling Bison, they had for the Weald in hopes of delivering on an election promise.


"Mates, I was just starting to enjoy this place... they run daily DotA 2 games for the other inmates and patients! A lot of them were also getting treated for rabies too!"

Somehow, the other Lobbyists weren't surprised at the notion of rabid DotA 2 players.



Lotion Soronarr takes the lead after winning a game of rock, paper, scissors. Leaving a pouting Su Lu Pi at the back of the formation.

As he descends into the forest paths, he ambushes a pack of Rabid Dogs.



Rah leaps into action, ready to make their enemies bleed.




"Ahahah ahahaohohoh!"

Pulling out his personal DotA 2 hero power rankings, Bison reads aloud his in-depth analysis of the game's heroes, causing tremendous pain and damage to their foes.


"No contest. Axe is clearly #1 for my playstyle, then I guess the Spectre is pretty good in the lategame too so that's #2..."



Su Lu Pi gets the final word, slaying the last dog with her Noxious Gas attack.



After taking a moment to celebrate the easy win, they travel onward in search of the Hag.



Coming across many obstacles.



But they manage to navigate them without much issue.



They enter the next room in their path, and stumble into a hostile group of enemies.



The Dogs go after Rah first, snapping, scratching and biting the Jester.



Meanwhile, the Old Lady in the background attempts to lay a curse on Su Lu Pi.



Understandably, the Plague Doctor doesn't take kindly to being cursed, and she retaliates with a paralyzing stun gas.



Bison once again pulls out his list, wounding one Dog and killing another.


"A lot of people use the Phantom Assassin but I reckon he's a little overrated..."



Su Lu Pi attacks again, this time with her Noxious Gas and she catches the old lady completely off-guard.



Not wanting to be outdone, Lotion charges at the remaining Dog, putting it out of its misery.




"I am the superior candidate!"

The Lobbyists continue to explore the Weald, but find few troubles in their way.


"SJW doesn't know we're coming to give her a big whack, I love it!"

With the Hag's corner surely not far, Lotion make the decision to rest up.


"I need everyone at 100%, and those dogs nipping at our heels have taken their toll."

With their foodstuffs still in great abundance, Lotion spares no expense on their recovery meal. The Lobbyists have a feast and take time to recuperate, focusing mentally on the challenge ahead.



Lotion offers a few words of encouragement to the team.



As does Su Lu Pi. Even now, the two of them were trying to sway the votes of Bison and Rah.



As their campfire begins to fade, the renewed Lobbyists continue their expedition. Sensing they are close to confronting the Hag, they quicken their marching speed.



However, as the doorway to the Hag comes into sight, they're blocked by one last group of foes. Two Ferocious Dogs and a Cultist.



The Dog moves first, deftly weaving through the party formation to strike at Su Lu Pi at the back. Luckily, the Plague Doctor easily avoids the yapping beast and forces it back.



However, as one of the Dogs yelps and scurries back to the Cultist, the other Dog nips at Su Lu Pi. This time, Su Lu Pi was unable to dodge the Dog's attacks.



Rah's grip on his Sickle tightens, and the Jester leaps into the fray, slicing at the Cultist and one of the Dogs. Unfortunately, his foes see his approach and easily avoid the sharp slashes.



Irritated at being held up by these enemies, Lotion unleashes a powerful attack, catching one of the Dogs dead-on. Literally.



The Crusader smirks at his kill, before swiftly jumping back to avoid the bites of the remaining Dog.



The Dog charges at Su Lu Pi again and the Plague Doctor is unable to stop the vicious attack.



Rah uses the opportunity to position himself between the Dog and the Cultist, giving the beast no way out. He executes the Dog with impunity.



The Cultist hesitates and takes a step back. The Lobbyists smile and surround their last remaining foe. Killing the Cultist easily.



With the Dog's bites and scratches taking their toll on the Lobbyists, Lotion allows the team to consume the rest of their food supplies and medicine.




"No point holding onto that stuff now."

As the group do their best to recovery the vitality they'd lost, Lotion takes a long deep breath before leading them through that final door. The Lobbyists step inside, and, as expected, the Hag was waiting for them.



The Hag didn't look so intimidating in this light, she looked nervous if anything. Not expecting the Lobbyists to strike until it was too late to stop their approach. But the Lobbyists had heard all the stories about Sim's doomed expedition. This would be a tough one.

[CrazyRah]

Nasty bites from those dogs! But we show 'em who can cause the most death!

[Billy-the-Squid]

Lol, this game makes me rage quit more than I should! I just keep coming back for the narrator 

[Johnnie Walker]

 *video snip*

 

toplel

 

 
"OneWeekOfHookersOneWeekOfHookersONEWEEKOFHOOKERS!ONEWEEKOFHOOKERS!!

 

No blackjack and blow too? Casual.

 

 
"Ahahah ahahaohohoh!"

 

Crusty.. I just realized. Rah is like "Crazy Eyes" in this LP.

(Inside joke from Ancient Aliens, to everyone else.)

 

 Lotion offers a few words of encouragement to the team.

 

Put the lotion on its skin or else it gets the hose again.

 

 
"SJW doesn't know we're coming to give her a big whack, I love it!"

 

The best character tbh.

[Voxr]

I liked the sword part. And the "swooosh"! The Dota powers are what holds it together tbh.

[Dio Demon]

 

No blackjack and blow too? Casual.

 

I though that was implied? Are you telling me it isn't? I... don't know what to think anymore...

[Dio Demon]

Knights you are back! This place descends to madness without you tbh. Good decent folk at each others throats, men feuding over limited resources, goodness its terrible. 

So it's like playing Age of Empires II here?

[mybudgee]

I could've died of rabies. I will never know

Me too

[Fast Jimmy]

Ha! The fact that you have Bison randomly giving DOTA build advice as part of his "attack" is killer.

 

Glad to have the series continue! Who will get the pot, I wonder?

[Lotion Soronarr]

The Emperor has a word for you, witch! And that word is "DIE"!

 

*does the Holy Lace*

 

I'm the tip of His spear. Getting the point?

[Bison]

Ha! The fact that you have Bison randomly giving DOTA build advice as part of his "attack" is killer.

People say Huskar is a carry because of how OP he is but really attack damage can kill him if you've got enough damage to contest. 

 

Centaur is also a great initiator with his ultimate and the stomp, as well as his strength gain which lets him soak damage like a sponge while Return flings it back like a ballistic sponge.

 

Juggernaut has a very fitting playstyle, he's a New Era carry and that's made him really difficult to kill, a competent magic immunity ability, a good heal, critical strike chance, and an ultimate that makes you invincible, how great that could be for this quest. 

[LPPrince]

LPKing advocates peeing in the shower. This is known.

 

IT GOES TO THE SAME PLACE JIMMY

[Gravisanimi]

IT GOES TO THE SAME PLACE JIMMY

Actually in campers and RVs the toilet goes to the black water tank, while the shower goes to the gray water tank.

[LPPrince]

 

 

 

LOL

 

Had me like

 

 

[LPPrince]

Actually in campers and RVs the toilet goes to the black water tank, while the shower goes to the gray water tank.

 

*superkicks Grav's shin*

[The Love Runner]

Lotion's assumption about me is false.

Just wanted to make that clear.

[Fast Jimmy]

IT GOES TO THE SAME PLACE JIMMY

 

[Jehuty]

From what? The "kill yourselves" threads?

Those are always fun. 

[Fast Jimmy]

People say Huskar is a carry because of how OP he is but really attack damage can kill him if you've got enough damage to contest.

Centaur is also a great initiator with his ultimate and the stomp, as well as his strength gain which lets him soak damage like a sponge while Return flings it back like a ballistic sponge.

Juggernaut has a very fitting playstyle, he's a New Era carry and that's made him really difficult to kill, a competent magic immunity ability, a good heal, critical strike chance, and an ultimate that makes you invincible, how great that could be for this quest.

/crit dmg

[C9316]

I have no idea what this is, but I like it.