99 réponses à ce sujet

[Asdrubael Vect]

We've been over this in a lot of threads but at the start of DAI you're not an important figure in the Inquisition in the way you seem to think. You're a religious symbol to those who believe in your divinity. That's why you get to walk into the war room instead of waiting outside like the hundreds of other members of the Inquisition.

The leaders, chosen by Justinia to lead an organisation made up exclusively of dedicated and zealous members of the Andrastian Chantry, are Josie, Cullen, Leliana and Cassandra.

After Haven, Cassandra backs away to make room for you. It's implied she was groomed to be Inquisitor by Justinia, which is why she's the one who gives you the speech about you "always leading it" (she's a good sport about it). She backs away because she's not leading a branch of the Inquisition and doesn't want to create dissent.

If you'd play Champions of the Just you'd see a dark hypothetical future where the Inquisitor is replaced by an envy demon. Lots of religious persecution.

To replace Leliana and Cullen - who lead 2/3rds of the Inquisition's forces with handpicked members - you'd have an open civil war.

Chantry have lost everything real and Justinia who was a religion symbol more than our hero and she was dead and before go against many in Chantry who already lost most what they have before that "peace"

 

most of all her clerics supporters die with her exept Cass and Lelianna who later openly refuse to obey Chantry and separate from them..and they officially have nothing what they said from beginning and we do all work to make Inquisition, we seriously can from beginning, after gathering some forced said them to get out, especially after getting mages and skyhold...we just by gameplay not have this option what was possible and we can do all without them

 

Inquisition is not and mostly was always heretical organisation without Oralis Chantry support

 

exept some minor and survived templars and seekers who was with Justinia-> Cass they are always was 1/5 of whole organisation what is based mostly on our hero(who is not some nobody in beginning like we was when we was a GW) who is the only one who have powers and everyone know about it and some even considerate his as a "god" what is heresy and you can deny that from beginning..we form most of organisation not them

 

1)most of our organisation is some common peoples and soldiers from ferelden, mercenaries, bunch of different peoples of different races who fight for you and not for chantry or cass and lelianna...and especially not because of Cullen

 

2)rebeled mages or lefted templars who was unlike other Templars with Seekers not join to Corynfeus....main serious forces without them in Inquisiition we was not really powerfull....we even officialy claimed of lord Inquisitor who close rifts and who command them

 

3)and we can have or not have a bunch of grey wardens what is a serious deal as with mages

 

Orlais army is not ours if we does not have brialla and gaspar as her puppet, only this situation make it mostly by our controll but still it is unnofitial

 

Cullen who actually is nothing without Cass(+ Leliana with her Josephine) was not really needed  even from beginning..and after we have some forces and do some things they are not suited to be in organisation anymore and loose all powers what they have left to exist only because of ours

[lil yonce]

@Shia; I think you've misunderstood me. When I said, "Too easily forgiving, particularly if the forgiveness is based on denying one's rightful emotions, can in the long run lead to the erosion of one's self-esteem and sense of justice," I wasn't referring to my inquisitor. That's a general statement on too easily forgiving. At the end, I explain that my inquisitor did not too easily forgive because justice has been adequately served and the first reparations to mages are being made. The "too easily forgiving" statement could apply to some random inquisitor but it doesn't apply to mine IMO.

My argument is a response to congokong's "should a mage romance/forgive Cullen". "Should" implies moral judgement in this case. So I give an answer on moral grounds. My argument states that it is morally justified to romance/forgive Cullen if you properly frame the forgiveness (If what we mean by forgiveness does not have to include complete overcoming of anger and resentment), and adhere to an ethics of care that values relationships and relatedness as moral goods. Forgiveness then has moral value and also transformative ability. According to Klein, "the emotionally mature, properly integrated self can stand ambivalence. Love usually wins over hatred, without entirely eliminating it, and this can lead to compassion and the the desire to make appropriate reparation." I wish that Cullen will one day fully understand her and make reparations. And Gheaus says, "If we think it possible to have relationships with people we believe to be partially (or at times) bad, without a loss of self-esteem and sense of justice, relationships with a history of wrongdoing have more chance of being at some point restored." My inquisitor feels this way about Cullen. Under an ethics of care restoration or new involvement is good because relationship is a moral good. Forgiveness is then a moral thing to do. It is then morally justified. congokong could disagree with me on different moral grounds.

And I disagree that Cullen reflects to the extreme. I don't think he mentions it as often as some think he does. I think his reflection time is about average, and sometimes improperly focused. He did not order the annulment but his role over ten years in Kirkwall was not small. And if we properly frame reflection as I did forgiveness, it isn't a one time thing never to be mentioned again. It is an ongoing process of meditation on the past and integration of new info/ideas.

Because reflection is an ongoing process, and because the inquisitor is a mage becoming involved with him knowing his past, and especially if she and Cullen clash on allying the mages (and she can address the disagreement with him after In Hushed Whispers so I consider it important), I think an apology would be most appropriate. She is a mage. He was a high ranking templar official who misjudged/wronged all mages in either direct action against them or in direct support of those who did. She is part of the group to whom he owes an apology. I'm not saying he must apologize face to face to every mage he meets in life going forward. But their relationship is not superficial, and she can have very strong concerns about his opinions on mages (i.e. after In Hushed Whispers). And as the OP's question is about should a mage romance/forgive Cullen, I think an apology would go a decent ways toward saying yes it is morally justifiable to romance/forgive him.

EDIT: Forgot to address one point. The events of DAI do have an impact on my decision to romance Cullen. Its perfectly simple to understand when you adopt the belief that forgiveness and justice are related. So long as it is unclear that justice has been served, it is perfectly fine to withhold forgiveness from an offender. Had there been no justice for mages whatsoever, my inquisitor wouldn't be too keen on forgiving Cullen for his actions against them. She'd still be angry with the state of things, with those who had been apart of the old system, and of them she'd be angry at those who weren't doing much to fix it. My inquisitor can more easily begin the process of forgiving when conditions are such that her anger has been ameliorated, and that happens when some justice has been done for mages.

[Shechinah]

(to Asdrubael Vect)

 

Unless I missed that part of the lore, the templars do not murder mages en mass because they are of a certain age. If so then Wynne and other mages who arrived at the circle as children would not be alive and we certainly would not be seeing old mages like Irving.

 

Since the mages can, amongst other things, form fraternities and argue with the Chantry for their own independence I wouldn't say they lose all their rights.  

 

The templar who abuse, rape and torture mages are certainly not the norm otherwise that would have been very apparent in the Mage Origin and they not allowed to do these things hence why a lot of them keep what they've done a secret or threaten the mages they've done it to or witnesses into silence as seen even in Kirkwall where Karas was worried enough to threaten Alain about it.

 

Now unless I missed it, where exactly and how exactly are mages forced to work to death with barely any food or water provided? Oh and are they denied food and water if their robes are dirty?

 

I do not recall that mages are randomly selected to be killed in awful ways like being burned alive as punishment for trying to escape the Circles. Why would Anders have survived for so long with all of his escape attempts if the Templars could just kill him to save themselves the trouble and embarassment and even make an example of him?

 

It can be argued the Circles are like different sorts of prisons but a concentration camp? I very much disagree.

[Br3admax]

Meh, perhaps they do perhaps they don't. Every mage I've ever played could take that bet. But, I concede, realistically it would be expensive. However the trade is through the chantry and the circles were run by the chantry. Really no need for a mage to actually BUY a potion. Exceptions would be the Inquisition which has it's own trade, and the Grey Wardens. Which also would have their own trade.

Nope. Most of that lyrium is for the Templars and craft for the Tranquil. Lyrium is limited resource that the Tower would simply never be able to afford for any mage to regularly use it. 

There are lots of references to mages consuming a lot of lyrium though. Both to replenish themselves and for their rituals. I would assume that having two different patrons on the docket is what makes the lyrium market so competitive between the mages and templars.

Lulz. You think the Chantry really allowed a "competitive" market for lyrium? When they control all of it on the surface? I'll assure you that the vast majority of it is going to other means besides rituals, and mages don't usually exert themselves in anything magical that requires "replenishing." 

 

 

All that aside, the residual effects still validate my argument. Avoiding another drug reference here so... it's kinda like tuna. You eat tuna today, still smell it on you tomorrow. That kind of thing.

There's nothing that says lyrium is like that. It's an incredibly dangerous mineral that is not safe to be around even when processed. There are no residual anythings.  

[trevelyan_shep]

Cullen has done some unforgivable things to mages in the past. I don't particularly believe him when he says he is a different man. He had so much hate for mages for the longest time up until the third game. I doubt all of that hate just simply disappeared just because the IQ is a mage. Idk, if it were me and I learned all that he had done to the mages I wouldn't be so forgiving.

[congokong]

To those who say a mage wouldn't know of Cullen's past.

 

1. She knows he was a templar, and second-in-command to Meredith who was rather infamous by that point.

2. In the quest Before the Dawn Cullen will reveal the history with Maddox. That was the point where I really questioned the romance's rationale. I thought, "How can a mage be ok with romancing a man who served as second-in-command for years, and defended, a woman who'd make a man tranquil over smuggled love letters?"

[Owlfruit Potion]

That was the point where I really questioned the romance's rationale. I thought, "How can a mage be ok with romancing a man who served as second-in-command for years, and defended, a woman who'd make a man tranquil over smuggled love letters?"

I don't see how whether the Inquisitor is a mage factors into it. What went on in Kirkwall was wrong whether the Inquisitor is a mage or not; and whether the Inquisitor is a mage or not, Cullen says explicitly that he didn't find out the worst of what Meredith was doing until after the fact,* and makes it clear that he deeply regrets not taking action sooner. Unless it's somehow OK for a non-mage Inquisitor to think Cullen did nothing wrong, or somehow not OK for a mage Inquisitor to forgive him, it shouldn't make a difference.

* and notably, he didn't find out because she was hiding it from him, because she knew he would object

[MelissaGT]

I don't see how whether the Inquisitor is a mage factors into it. What went on in Kirkwall was wrong whether the Inquisitor is a mage or not; and whether the Inquisitor is a mage or not, Cullen says explicitly that he didn't find out the worst of what Meredith was doing until after the fact,* and makes it clear that he deeply regrets not taking action sooner. Unless it's somehow OK for a non-mage Inquisitor to think Cullen did nothing wrong, or somehow not OK for a mage Inquisitor to forgive him, it shouldn't make a difference.

* and notably, he didn't find out because she was hiding it from him, because she knew he would object

 

//\\ THIS, and THIS \\//

 

Cullen spends the entire mage romance bending over backwards to apologize and condemn himself for everything that he is, has been, might have been, could possibly be in another universe, everything he's ever done in his life, everything he's ever not done too, every breath he takes, his very inexcusable existence in this world. If that's not enough self-flagellation, grovelling and begging at your Inquisitor's feet to satisfy her petty and rancorous need for her significant other to despise himself for the rest of his life for the mistakes of his past and never ever entertain the idea of maybe one day forgiving himself and starting over... perhaps your mage Inky should just romance someone else, and spare both of you the grievance.

 

 

And I just wanted to add to the whole conversation - 

 

Not all Templars are cruel and evil people, and not all mages are innocents. Not all mages are oppressed victims either. Viv sums it up perfectly when she talks about how each circle being different is the problem. The circle she came from was more relaxed, and was more of a place of protection for mages to practice and study. Some mages even lived outside the circle. The Trevelyan IQ also hails from Ostwick, which is a more relaxed circle.  

 

Yes, I sit in the Templar "camp." But I also played through the game first with a mage IQ - who was Pro-Circle - and romanced Cullen. And if we're meta-gaming and branding Cullen as "bad" for what he did/didn't do in DA:2, just look at all the bad crap the mages did! It was bad - if not worse. However, a Trevelyan IQ would have none of the details about what happened in Kirkwall, other than that there was a rebellion and Meredith was crazy. However, on the flip-side, Orsino also ended up going nutters. So don't vilify the Templars without also acknowledging the misdeeds of the mages. In the end, both were wrong. It's a catch-22.

 

It's not as easy as saying "Tempar = bad, Mage = good." There are baddies on both sides. But in answer to the OP's question of should she even be with him because she's a mage? Why not - there's nothing to forgive. He's clearly one of the "good ones."

 

However, the Cullen x Mage romance still isn't for me, and here's why: as others have said, Cullen bends over backwards the entire game apologizing over and over about his regrets. And a mage IQ can keep on bringing it up, like a little girl always needing to be told that she's pretty. She really can tie him into some nasty knots if she wants to. Personally, all that grovelling and mind-games left a bad taste in my mouth. And if you really have problems romancing Cullen as a mage, go the opposite and romance him as a different class and get a different (better, in my opinion) story altogether. 

[Br3admax]

To those who say a mage wouldn't know of Cullen's past.

 

1. She knows he was a templar, and second-in-command to Meredith who was rather infamous by that point.

2. In the quest Before the Dawn Cullen will reveal the history with Maddox. That was the point where I really questioned the romance's rationale. I thought, "How can a mage be ok with romancing a man who served as second-in-command for years, and defended, a woman who'd make a man tranquil over smuggled love letters?"

Because Meredith wasn't the one that made him Tranquil and already disapproved the plans and Final-esque solutions of the one who did?

[The Baconer]

Because Meredith wasn't the one that made him Tranquil and already disapproved the plans and Final-esque solutions of the one who did?

 

Uh, Meredith was the one who had Maddox rendered Tranquil, as confirmed by Cullen himself. Cullen also goes on to state she "wielded the brand for far lesser sentences".

[KaiserShep]

Because Meredith wasn't the one that made him Tranquil and already disapproved the plans and Final-esque solutions of the one who did?

She disapproves of the plan to make all mages tranquil, but that doesn't really change the fact that she used the rite of tranquility as punishment with a fairly lower standard than what it was meant for.

[AresKeith]

(to Asdrubael Vect) Please, tell me you don't mean it like the Circles = Concentration camps nonsense because that comparison is terrible in so many ways.

 

Also, "kirkwall temples"?

 

Don't bother with him

 

I want to say he's trolling, but sadly he isn't 

[thetinyevil]

I really think if a mage inquisitor romanced Cullen that they should have met a mage from Kirkwall who was their during Cullen's tenure as Knight-Captain. Then been allowed to really confront him about what she learned. 

[SgtSteel91]

To those who say a mage wouldn't know of Cullen's past.

 

1. She knows he was a templar, and second-in-command to Meredith who was rather infamous by that point.

2. In the quest Before the Dawn Cullen will reveal the history with Maddox. That was the point where I really questioned the romance's rationale. I thought, "How can a mage be ok with romancing a man who served as second-in-command for years, and defended, a woman who'd make a man tranquil over smuggled love letters?"

 

Don't forget to add when he says "Meredith's methods were harsh, but they kept the people safe." Her methods really didn't keep the Mages safe, or do still think Mages are not people?

 

I just chalk it up to Cullen still reataining Chantry/Templar programming that dehumanizes Mages. Inquisition is more like a healing/recovery arc in terms of coming to terms with his lyrium addiction and pstd and not so much a redemption arc.

[SgtSteel91]

She disapproves of the plan to make all mages tranquil, but that doesn't really change the fact that she used the rite of tranquility as punishment with a fairly lower standard than what it was meant for.

 

Or that she stopped him when then number of Tranquil started to increase and that some of those Tranquil were Mages who passed their Harrowing.

[lil yonce]

[snip] Inquisition is more like a healing/recovery arc in terms of coming to terms with his lyrium addiction and pstd and not so much a redemption arc.

I agree with this. Its what I dislike most about his arc in DAI. He doesn't "bend over backwards" for a mage inquisitor or "grovel at her feet" as others say. That's laughable. He doesn't directly address much about it at all. His past, in context of his mistreatment/misjudgment of mages, is actually somewhat glossed over in favor of a ptsd/addiction arc.

 

And to address other points I see: Actually, all mages are oppressed. That's kind of the point. And Orsino's actions were in response to Meredith's. It isn't fair to say Orsino is a bad mage because for the most part he played the hand Meredith dealt him.

[jtav]

Not to say that I particularly care for a mage!Trevelyan/Cullen dynamic because I found out earlier today that it squicks me, but Cullen owns up to his wrongdoing and tries to reform. That's really all I can ask.

[duckley]

One additional dynamic in Kirkwall was that there sure seemed to be a lot of crazy Mages running around. Templars may have felt some need to be more strict in order to keep themselves, the citizenry, and other mages safe. That does not excuse excessive or abusive behaviour, but could account for Cullens more hard line view. That and his being tortured by Mages in Ferelden, certainly didnt encouraage Cullen to have a kinder, gentler view of Mages.

[MelissaGT]

I agree with this. Its what I dislike most about his arc in DAI. He doesn't "bend over backwards" for a mage inquisitor or "grovel at her feet" as others say. That's laughable. He doesn't directly address much about it at all. His past, in context of his mistreatment/misjudgment of mages, is actually somewhat glossed over in favor of a ptsd/addiction arc.

 

And to address other points I see: Actually, all mages are oppressed. That's kind of the point. And Orsino's actions were in response to Meredith's. It isn't fair to say Orsino is a bad mage because for the most part he played the hand Meredith dealt him.

 

Yes, and if there weren't any bad mages that abused their powers then the Templars wouldn't feel such a need to keep a buffer between them and the general public. For the most part, all I saw in DA:2 were mages proving that Templars need to be around. Then again, from your perspective, mages wouldn't turn to demons if the Templars didn't push them to it. I already said - Catch 22. 

 

What came first, the chicken or the egg? There are always and will always be bad examples of both. 

 

And not all mages feel oppressed - or did you not spend time talking to Vivienne in-game? 

 

I can also think of several occasions for a mage IQ to bring up the "are you sure you're ok with me being a mage?" or "you're alone with a mage - are you ok with that?" or "do you have a problem with me being a mage?" or "I'm a mage, can you ever think of me as more?" or the best of the bunch "If I were possessed, would you...?" Talk about putting the guy on the spot all the time. How many times does the poor man have to say that he doesn't care? I can only ask my b/f so many times if those pants make my butt look big before he gets annoyed and we get into a fight. 

[Ashaantha]

 

I can also think of several occasions for a mage IQ to bring up the "are you sure you're ok with me being a mage?" or "you're alone with a mage - are you ok with that?" or "do you have a problem with me being a mage?" or "I'm a mage, can you ever think of me as more?" or the best of the bunch "If I were possessed, would you...?" Talk about putting the guy on the spot all the time. How many times does the poor man have to say that he doesn't care? I can only ask my b/f so many times if those pants make my butt look big before he gets annoyed and we get into a fight. 

 

I honestly thought the little snappy conversation after allying with the mages fitted my playthrough well enough. That was the "you weren't happy with me bringing in the mages, do you have a problem with me too?" conversation choice, it didn't have anything to do with flirting or romance from memory but my mage was a bit cranky at the time I guess. Starting the romance with him as a mage and asking if he could see you as something more makes sense mostly, but bugging him any further about it, I agree with your comment in that case. I put up with with that last sentence myself more then enough at home too xD

[lil yonce]

I can also think of several occasions for a mage IQ to bring up the "are you sure you're ok with me being a mage?" or "you're alone with a mage - are you ok with that?" or "do you have a problem with me being a mage?" or "I'm a mage, can you ever think of me as more?" or the best of the bunch "If I were possessed, would you...?" Talk about putting the guy on the spot all the time. How many times does the poor man have to say that he doesn't care? I can only ask my b/f so many times if those pants make my butt look big before he gets annoyed and we get into a fight. 

Cullen is not insensitive about her questioning. He doesn't take issue with it. If he felt poorly about it I don't think he'd attempt to clarify anything for her. And if one reviews his responses, one knows that he does not mire himself in apology to the extreme as people here believe. His responses are quite basic, they come close to apology only rarely, and sometimes they're even unrelated to the questions asked. I start the romance after Perseverance so only twice do I get any substantial response about the mage/templar aspect of the romance. That's when you first initiate it and at the lake scene (if you press the matter), and in neither of those scenes does Cullen stretch to the extreme of mea culpas. I don't know why one would find he has no spine or has debased himself or that the mage!inquisitor somehow wants that or anything lunatic like that.

 

So why do some believe that? The sense I get is this: a mage!inquisitor questioning a little or even at all as things about his past come up or as he says things that she disagrees with/takes offense at-- that's just off limits to some people. I think they feel that mentioning it once is good enough and then you should move on forever. Someone posted something like "Cullen is one of the good ones" so she shouldn't wonder at all. But it is possible to think someone is overall a good person and yet wonder at parts of them. Reflection is continuous, and there is nothing unhealthy about how its approached in this aspect.

 

So what does he say in each situation: 

 

Spoiler

After Perseverance:

"Cullen I care for you and... "

"What's wrong?"

"I'm a mage. After what you've been through could you think of me as anything more?"
I could, I mean I do think of you and what I might say in this situation."
"What's stopping you?"
"You're the inquisitor. We're at war and you haven't always seen me in the best light."  I don't see bending over backwards.
"And yet I'm still here."

"So you are."

 

"Alone with a mage, that doesn't concern you?"

"The templars have rules on... fraternization. But I'm no longer bound by them." I don't see much of anything there. Its actually unrelated to the question. If you press the matter you get this:

"I know, but... you've seen the worst mages have to offer. How can you not see that in me?"
"I don't. If I've given you reason to doubt... (sighs) Of course I have. Whatever I fear of magic, I see none of that in you." This is substantial and I appreciate it.

 

"do you have a problem with me being a mage?" -- This isn't related to the romance and I think it happens early in the game when this would be a very fair concern.

 

"I'm a mage, can you ever think of me as more?" -- This is only variation of the romance initiation scene I went over at the top.

 

"If I were possessed, would you...?" -- And about this he doesn't say much of anything. In some cases he'll say "yes I have to do my job". In others its totally unclear what he'd do.

 

In each case something has come up to prompt those questions. At the initial meetings, after Perseverance (in my case) to start the romance, after Before the Dawn, after Adamant, and perhaps something he said left the inquisitor wondering for a moment. I.e. he says "Meredith's methods were harsh, but they kept people safe." If that makes the inquisitor uncomfortable its conceivable (predictable IMO) to ask how he feels about being with a mage or being alone with one.

[llandwynwyn]

I don't see how whether the Inquisitor is a mage factors into it. What went on in Kirkwall was wrong whether the Inquisitor is a mage or not; and whether the Inquisitor is a mage or not, Cullen says explicitly that he didn't find out the worst of what Meredith was doing until after the fact,* and makes it clear that he deeply regrets not taking action sooner. Unless it's somehow OK for a non-mage Inquisitor to think Cullen did nothing wrong, or somehow not OK for a mage Inquisitor to forgive him, it shouldn't make a difference.

* and notably, he didn't find out because she was hiding it from him, because she knew he would object

 

Honestly, this is what makes romancing him with a pro-mage (not only mages) problematic. I don't care how BioWare wrote this, but he is obviously lying, why would Meredith hide things from him when he was more extreme than her in Act 1? Also, going to the Gallows, you could hear the torture going on inside. He knew enough.

[QueenCrow]

I wonder how you - and this is a general you - would feel if something happened to Cullen (again) to justify his fears and former views.  How about if during the romance scene when the Inquisitor is in bed with him and he's having nightmares, that turns out to be a fade walker tormenting him with a desire demon.  And the lyrium issue makes him vulnerable to it.

 

What a coup it would be to gain demonic control over the Commander of the Inquisition forces!  That may even be better than Lord Seeker Lucius or the Wardens.  And though everyone's opinions about his unfairness in formerly painting -all- mages with a broad brush are completely valid, would opinions change if Cullen faced being tortured and broken again in DA:I...if his greatest fears were realized (again) if his willingness to love was used to break him (again)?

[Exile Isan]

I think this mostly comes down to whether your mage sees him as a templer or a just a man. In the case my Trevelyan mage, Eleanor, she saw him as the former at first and then the latter simply because Cullen is one of the few of the Inquisition in the beginning who seems to really care about the Inquisitor's well being. He asked her how she felt about the title 'Herald of Andraste', he defended her against Roderick and those in the Inquisition who wanted her to risk her life foolishly (sending her into Redcliffe Castle during In Hushed Whispers), or the only one who showed concern and sympathy about her mind being invaded by Envy if you do Champions of the Just. I headcanon that it was the conversation and jokes that they had a Roderick's expense that made her stop seeing him as more than 'that ex-Templer" or Commander of the Inquisitions forces and more as just Cullen. (That conversation cracks me up "The stuff of nightmares!")

 

Also the inquisitor doesn't know the Cullen from before, the Templer that we players met in Kinloch Hold/Kirkwall. She's not going to know that things he said and did (things he regrets btw), all she knows is the man she's met and talked with, joked with, found common ground with, and possibly fallen in love with. She may be wary about their relationship and his acceptance of her being a mage, but that actually only comes up twice in the romance despite what people say.* Once in the beginning when you first start the romance with him when she asks him if he could see past her being a mage and see the woman that she is too. And then again at the lake after Perseverance when you found out that he was tortured by demons summoned by mages. It stands to reason that a mage in this situation would want a little reassurance that he is okay with her being a mage and wants to know what he thinks of her as a mage. And this is just headcanon but I get the feeling that part of the reason Cullen "didn't think it was possible" was because she is a mage and he was a templer and that she wouldn't want to be with him because of it. The majority of their relationship though is boy meets girl, boy likes girl, girl likes boy, boy and girl start relationship. 

 

*The mage thing does come up one other time, but that's not romance related and only happens if you ally with the rebel mages).

[Owlfruit Potion]

Honestly, this is what makes romancing him with a pro-mage (not only mages) problematic. I don't care how BioWare wrote this, but he is obviously lying, why would Meredith hide things from him when he was more extreme than her in Act 1? Also, going to the Gallows, you could hear the torture going on inside. He knew enough.

Because nothing gets by DA2 Cullen.

In seriousness, though, this sounds much more to me like a reason why it's "problematic" for people on the other end of the Thedas religious/political spectrum to romance him (though I think calling other players' choice of LI problematic is a jerk move regardless of who it is, and if I had half a brain I'd have stayed out of this thread, but I don't). When he does bring up his regrets, "You made mistakes under horrible circumstances, but you're a good person and I love that person" is a very different response from "You shouldn't regret your past at all; mages can't be trusted or our friends, and responding to your charges' complaints about their imprisonment by buying more copies of the Chant for them to read was a 100% compassionate and reasonable response!" By DA:I he's clawed his way up a mountain to be the moderate-liberal templar he was before the Blight again, and I don't like the idea of his LI telling him he shouldn't have bothered.
 
Furthermore, I hate the idea that because mages are oppressed, they should be further oppressed by not being allowed to reciprocate anyone's romantic feelings they want to reciprocate (also a common reaction to Cullen/Amell or Cullen/Surana).