So do guys always say things like that when they think no one is around to hear them. A child(not me) or woman(me) might be playing with you.
Needless to say, I thanked my friend for the game and went back to pugging, at least the people there don't talk as much.
So a online acquaintance of mine, whom may or may not occasionally be on BSN (I honestly can't remember) has a similar experience to you, where I was that "friend".
So when I played ME3MP on Xbox 360, there was this quite entertaining person I played with quite frequently whom was quite offensive (part ot the "acquired taste" charm, I suppose). He never really insulted other people (unless they were friends... it's a cultural thing), he just had a generally vulgar way of speaking.
Well, I am the type where I want to play with everyone. I get along with a wide variety of people, so why not? I invited this mild-mannered friend into the party with me and him... and she brought along another female friend.
See, the problem is that I don't really pay attention to gender with gamers. You play games, I play games... who cares about gender? Except when the offensive guy start going on about his... "Black Widow" and using it as a *ahem*... "spear"... in reference to the Banshee he was kiting. To his credit, he was actually using the Black Widow, but I think everyone knows what he meant. It was kind of a witty, game-relevant double-entandre. She and her friend were not impressed.
Funny enough, she was just like you: Politely excused her and her friend after the match, then sent me a message explaining the issue. Apologies all around, lesson learned. Not everyone wants their gaming mired by vulgar commentary, as it were.
Funny enough (and on topic), that offensive player had some of the most colourful and comedic insults I've ever heard. Anyone is familiar with the American inner-city social pastime known as "cracking" will know what I am talking about. I will not be repeating any of them here, but suffice to say I won that game against him with what his friend termed as "the best anti-racist comeback" he'd ever heard.