He is supposedly the spirit of compassion, and yet he disagrees with everything compassionate or just. If you allow the Grey Wardens to stay in Orlais and help the Inquisition, he greatly disapproves... so he honestly thinks they should be punished or vilified for being tricked? Ser Ruth turns herself in afterward for your judgement, wishing for execution at the Inquisition's hand and declaring her guilt. Show compassion by refusing to judge her, as she was tricked and manipulated, then Cole disagrees. Yet, if you imprison her or exile her to the Deep Roads then he approves. When he says something and you respond with a compassionate, sympathetic, or understanding remark then he disagrees. Yet he will agree if you do the opposite of being compassionate.
Maybe his companion quest will give a competent explanation why all this is, but I doubt it will. The guy literally makes no sense to me.
You don't have to be one-dimensional to not be a hypocrite, or even the polar opposite of what he claims he wants to do for others.
First of all, compassion is not the same as justice. They can overlap, but not always. He's not being a hypocrite, you just have a different view on it than he does.
The Grey Wardens hurt a lot of people with their idiocy. Yes, idiocy. They allowed themselves to be tricked because they have a "go it alone" mentality. And yet they trusted some random Tevinter magister guy instead of, I don't know, talking to the leaders of kingdoms or something, one of which is a Warden himself (depending on import)! They were the ones Corypheus was using to assault the Divine at the Conclave, which eventually lead to the explosion, the Breach, and thousands of deaths. The same applies to Ser Ruth. Although I might add that if you instead allow her to go on an early Calling in the Deep Roads Cole does approve of that.
When he says something and you respond with a compassionate, sympathetic, or understanding remark then he disagrees. Yet he will agree if you do the opposite of being compassionate.
I'll assume this is referring to the Inquisitor's option of telling Cole, who is worried he will be manipulated into killing people, that it will be all right (or whatever the first nice choice is). The reason he disapproves of that is because he doesn't want you to be nice to him in that moment, he wants assurance that he won't hurt anyone ever again. You may think you're being nice in this instance, but you're really just increasing his anxiety over the whole thing.