It depends on voice actors, gear, and facial hair options.
If the voice actor situation is lopsided like in the original ME trilogy, I'm definitely playing as a female. If both VA's are relatively unremarkable, like it was the case with DAI, I'll play a female character first and a male character second. If both VA's are unremarkable but males have awesome facial hair options (please, BioWare, make amazing beards happen--and by "amazing beards" I don't mean the plastic chin-helmet abominations from DAI-- I know you can do it) then I might play male first and female second. If female PC is forced to wear stripper versions of male gear, I'm playing as a male. Also, If there is a "beer gut" option and it's specific to one gender, I'm automatically going with that gender regardless of everything else.
So, in summary, best VA wins... unless they're voicing a stripper. If both VA's are equal, I'll play both genders and the playing order will be determined by the inclusion or absence of beer gut and luscious beards.