Yeeeeah, riiiight.
I think it is fairly obvious that DA2 Elves look like that because Varric doesn't like the way they look. Maybe he's a tiny bit racist - I mean, Merrill and Fenris (his two Elven friends) are more or less the only "good" looking Elves in the game.
Since DA:O, we were told that Elves (women, especially) are beautiful, thinner, shorter, pointy-eared humans essentially... THAT HUMANS FIND VERY ATTRACTIVE.
I don't know, but DA2 Elves wouldn't get a second look from me. And I'm fairly certain most men wouldn't like looking at a woman that looks like DA2 Elves, either.
So, a) DA2 Elves look that way because it's actually Varric, telling the story to Cassandra (thus, entirety of DA2 happens from Cassandra's point of view, if you think about it)
it contradicts a considerable amount of what we were told about Elves.
And YES, in DAI, Elven women look once again like just the kind of women most men would probably find pleasing to look at.
Unless you hate the pointy ears bit, and (in the case of the Dalish) Vallaslin the face tattoo.
Also, I believe it is quite unlikely we (humanity) are alone in the universe, just looking at the sheer amount of stars our galaxy has - and each and every one supposedly has a "survivable" zone, just like Sol. Don't tell me there aren't other sentient races in the galaxy. It doesn't make any sense to me. They might be watching us right now... Or they might be going through their equivalent to the Stone Age.
Now go ahead and prove me none of those sentient races wouldn't look similar to us. Good luck, since we don't even know where they are.