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[Serelir]

I could write a book about my family, but in brief: father was literally a rocket scientist, but extremely critical and probably had Aspergers; mother equally unsympathetic and extremely negative. One sister has BPD, but my other sibs and I have survived, more or less, somewhat damaged, but we manage to find happiness. I struggled with depression for much of my life. 

 

I've often thought I should create a line of greeting cards for dysfunctional families, because I used to stand there looking at all the cards for Father's Day and thinking how any of them would have to be sarcastic, like, "Dad, we had such good times together, and you were always there for me." Not.

 

Mine would say, "Dad, you fucked up my life, but I credit you with teaching me not to put up with assholes."

[Uccio]

There are some fun memories yes, I used to be scared of my father. I was always happy when he was gone, I used to get beaten by him. I guess that is why I have trained all my life using little home psychology, not to get beaten again. Talk about dysfunctional families. 

[raging_monkey]

**** I sorry guys what ya'll went through makes sound like nothing apologies.

[Serelir]

That makes me want to hug you! Such terrible things people do to children. 

 

When my father was out of the house, it was as if a weight had been lifted and I could breathe. I took care of him when he was dying, and even though it was really hard, I felt better about myself for doing it - I could never do anything right according to my father, I never measured up, but in the end, I was able to do something for him.

 

I know that most of the issues I've struggled with came from my family, but I try to be conscious of how they affected me and to treat other people with kindness. It was such a revelation to me to discover that other families complimented each other instead of criticizing, and took the time to ask how it's going and actually listen.

 

I guess the bright side is that an unhappy family makes for great writing material 

[Serelir]

nah, Monkey, yours sounds pretty similar! My parents weren't physically abusive, but the mental/verbal abuse was damaging in its own way. 

[raging_monkey]

Thanks

I often wonder if I could be the better man when my parents are dying. You hear it day in day out you'll miss them. But all I can think of is "funeral costs, dealing with people, listening to last will and testimony " idk if I'm selfish or just a sociopath.

I know I always see a angle someone plays and can tell ones character but even then I gravitate to the similar controlling people.

Again apologies for my little rants... moms late and I'm getting twichy

[Serelir]

Please don't apologize! I felt like I derailed your thread a bit.

 

Yeah, I always hear that from people, all the platitudes. Or if I say my mother is driving me mad, I have a friend who will say she wishes her mother were still alive. Instant guilt. People with non-abusive parents simply can't understand what it's like. When people go on about family ties, it makes me want to vomit. 

 

And no, I don't wish my dad was still here. I can say that. There are times when I remember him or when I re-live just how horrifying and sad it was when he was dying. I'm able to remember things about him that make me laugh, ruefully, like how pompous he was. I had no desire to organize a funeral service. My sister did it, and I just went through the whole thing like a zombie.

 

I think I managed to take what I learned from my parents and raise my kids differently. I hope so. My son often tells me he's grateful I didn't act like his friends' parents, so I guess I did okay. 

[Uccio]

I got both, mental and physical beating. But it is ok, I try to not be bitter about nor I tend to vent about it. If I would I would be pissed all the time. Water under the bridge as they say. Life is too short for musing over bad things. Tik tak. Alright, back to topic.

[raging_monkey]

Oh the subject manner allowed for derailment (sides I'm not a stickler for one topic discussions )

And that's what I think will happen to me just coast through it.

I worry having kids the idea sounds great but it terrifies me that I'll be a mediocre parent at best.


And you seem like the awesome parent

[raging_monkey]

Agreed ucci next arc will be ready at 3:30

[Serelir]

I like that expression: Tik Tak! I'm going to use that. 

[raging_monkey]

Act 178: apprentice 's idea

Spoiler

coldi sat in the river feeling the end of summer turn to fall as the cold water soaked her body. She summoned her wisps she'd affectionatly named blue,pica, and stratos, giving them a sense of personality. Blue was the sedate one that stood by her side at all times, pica was the mischievous one often terrifying Galatea by pestering her while she slept and stratos was the more violent one reacting to her frustrations amplifying her power.

She greeted them playfully splashing water near them as they danced around her. "Master is just too paranoid " she said dancing in the water with her pets. She saw bird swoop down trying to eat pica, she casted entropy at the bird scaring it away.

"Pica leave the beasts alone" she teased holding it in the palm of her hand. In the days since began training to hone her gifts she found companship with not only her adopted family but with the benign spirits she would devote her talents keeping them out of the fade for as long as possible.

She began to see that spirits and demons were just misunderstood stood and a demon could be good and if they were bad the could be redeemed. She rose from the water freezing it with ear step she took with her pets in tow to ask her master on what she came to believe

[raging_monkey]

Act 179: craft

Spoiler

monkai crept into vale's workshop , painstakingly avoiding the traps she laid through out her workshop. It was riddled with oddly designed contraptions that he had the faintest clue what they were. He slid to the front of her desk raising a bottle of expensive wine to her eyes.

"Its not ready yet.. oooh is that a 4:56 fratue... oh that's rare" vale said taking the bottle and putting it her rack of various wines she collected over the years, she enjoyed tasting it but found more enjoyment in collecting

"Aww but it's been over a year" monkai whined at another delay to the project. He had seen her project for a anti-abomination trap evolve into a unknown project that only she knew.

"Now now my friend rushing genius is a sin against the the maker " vale teased offering him a glass of wine

Xxx

Monkai paced around vale for hours as she screwed the last of the screws into a eight-sided pyramid. " And done... " she said wiping the grease from her hands and tossing the item to him.

Monkai looked it over confused by it's design. Artifice was never his field of study, he enjoyed the mechanics but was often perplexed by their purpose. "And this.." he asked sniffing it like a wolf that was deciding whether to eat it.

Vale giggled amused by the younger mage's lack of creativity. " It's a device I call "the prism" granted it requires a mage's skill to fully use it can do this" vale said pressing a sapphire gem on the device. Monkai heard the pins click inside the device twirling making a unbearable sound that brought him to his knees.

"TURN IT OFF!" Monkai screamed hearing the noise tear his skull apart. Vale pressed the stone ending his torment.

" it emits a sound that should subdue any normal person but if used on a mage it will do the same." She said taking her screwdriver and twirling it between her fingers.

"You mentioned a mage could use it properly " monkai said rubbing his ears hoping it did more than make his ears bleed.

"Oh that the metal is made from refined lyrium ore mixed with star metal, now it should be a amp for your magical abilities but if need be it can be channelled to be large bomb that should wreck half the city" vale said raising her arms in excitement.

Monkai gave her a concerned look. "Your giving me a bomb... a four thousand sovereign bomb..." he asked carefully putting the prism away on his belt.

"No I'm giving you a amp that can be used as a bomb... but I'll be severely cross if you detonate it. I like the city this time of year." She said.

Monkai held her shoulders giving her his look when she made something dangerous "remind me to never get on your bad side"

" haha and lose my favorite client.. i say not... but really don't detonate it I've seen your injuries and from what you told me of your... condition not even you will survive it." Vale warned.

"I know I know the fall festival is soon" monkai teased.

Monkai shared a glass of wine with his friend grateful for her support with his random requests. "I hate to ask but can fix my locks... a relative broke them"

"...what you do to my locks... " vale asked furious by her work being destroyed cracking her knuckles, intending to charge triple for the repair

[raging_monkey]

Act 180: academy

Spoiler

A woman shouted behind the door her accent was orlaisan, and she was dressed gaudy yellow patterned with black squares in the fabric. She pounded on the door as her intended refused to answer.

The girl scratched the shaved parts of her hair snorting mucous from her nose spitting it out to the floor. "I'm up I'm up mother " she said putting on her robe.

The woman entered her daughter's rushing her from her sloth like movement. "Quickly quickly we must hurry the ceremony is about to begin ." She said her accent intensifying.

"Will father be there? He said he would " the daughter asked fixing her hair taking a glob of candlewax styling it as a spike

"No business in fereldan, bunch of dog-lords they are" the mother said straightening her daughter's skirt. The daughter scoffed at her disappointment "all's business even on my day" she said.

Xxx

The girl waited for the first enchanter to arrive to greet her and the other students. The looked at her with dismissal, thinking that she being a laetan was a affront to to their status as altus. She gave them the finger as one of them whispered slurs in her direction.

"Typical laetan.. lacking in manners" the girl said laughing

"My name's Louise.. call me a laetan again and I'll end you" Louise said pushing the girl. The apprentices heard the hall door open looking to see the first enchanter step to the pedestal scribbling in his ledger.

"Apprentices I'm interim first enchanter monkai ragin. While here at the minrathous circle you will learn everything from theory to application of it, politics, mathematics, honor to you house and the magisterium. " monkai said folding his book, Louise noticed how his voice had a hint of rivaini in it mixed with his tevinter accent. It sounded like her mothers when she put on airs.

"Yes first enchanter " the apprentices said in unison as he instructed them to see their respective instructors

[raging_monkey]

Act 181: student

Spoiler

Louise sat in her chair nodding off from the enchanter's lecture on the early days of tevinter. She found history to be a lackluster class,but despite her intital arrival,she had surround herself with friends that affectionaty called her "coldi" due to her preference for ice magicks and habit of chilling the the locks on the wine cellars. It drove the first enchanter mad, every time someone complained of a lack of wine.

"Little zakum please pay attention " the enchantress said. Coldi looked up to the enchantress, her name was Via Grapha a mage of odd circumstances.

"Apologies mistress but your such a boring speaker I could not help but sleep at your words" coldi said.

Grapha merely laughed. "Perhaps going to the artificier would make things a bit more to your liking " she said.

XXx

Coldi entered the artificer's office carrying a heavy package ,she had heard the first enchanter had hired her as a consultant for security, and that they worked extensively renovating the circle. She saw her tinker with a odd shaped lock, setting it down as she grew annoyed by it's failure.

"Um senior artificer I was told to come here" coldi said accidently knocking over the shelf causing a loud ruckus. The artificer looked at her sighing at the mess on the floor.

"Ah yes miss zakum you've arrived. I was told you had a package" the artificer said moving to pick up the shelf, glad the wine wasn't broken.

Coldi gave her host the package bowing polity. She sensed a odd calm in the artificer, like she had entered a maelstrom that slowly receded.

"Ah my manners I'm Alessandra Valentius,pleasure to make your aquintance " alessandra said returning the bow.

Coldi felt awkward by the woman's polite demeanor. She wasn't a image but wondered how she had risen so high in status. "Well I'm coldi ...I mean Louise zakum "

"Yes I know and I am I keeping you from your studies" alessandra said pointing to the door deciding her break was over.

Coldi had realized she would be late for her next class ran from her office, tripping over a gear hoping down the hall

[Serelir]

Someone invent a force field to put around that woman! Dancing lessons for Coldi - that'd be a trip.

[raging_monkey]

Hehe well yeah it works

[raging_monkey]

Act 182: explusion

Spoiler

coldi sat in her chair in the library reading a book, penned by the mysterious first enchanter. She was mesmerized by it's contents noting how the theories he wrote in them would change the world. "Fascinating" she thought as a shadow blocked her light.

"A bit of late reading " grapha said sitting on the table. Coldi wondered why in the past weeks she always was harassing her interuppting her solace.

"Class is over don't you have other places to be" coldi said moving her chair so she could see. Grapha chuckled at her indifference finding it amusing.

"Well you are failing... so it's a business transaction " grapha said placing her hand onto coldi's. Coldi snatched her hand away annoyed by her implication.

"I think I'd rather fail than let a old hag mount me" coldi said leaving

XxX

In the weeks that followed grapha's proposition coldi refused to attend her lectures feeling awkward and uncomfortable being in her presence. Instead she hide in the old catacombs tracing a sigil onto the ground, copying the design from the first enchanter's book.

"And done "she said finishing the design. Her past attempts had been met with failure but today it spoke of success as she clapped her hands to active the glyph.

"I told you a student who dabbles in forbidden arts " graphs said leading a contingent of templars. Coldi swore as the carted her off smearing her tracing. She saw grapha blow a kiss to her mocking her for refusing her bargain

[Serelir]

Evil!

[raging_monkey]

Very much so

[raging_monkey]

Act 183: taste

Spoiler

coldi packed her room as she seethed in anger. She realized grapha had been watching her as she dabbled in her new hobby waiting til she had enough evidence to have her expelled from the circle. Were it not for the considerable coin her father paid to the magisterium she would have been tranquil.

"Venhedis fastavas " she said putting the box away. Furious by her future ruined,never able to rise in station unless married off. "Three thousand leagues away from the circle I live within that!" She said staring at her empty room.

Grapha knocked on her door smiling at her. "Should have just taken my offer little girl...a altus must not be denied " she said grabbing coldi's face.

"Mount yourself bi*ch I told you I have no interest in hags. " coldi said slapping her hand away. She began to leave when grapha began to accost her.

"You have such smooth skin.. and such endowments for your age I must have a taste before your sullied by a low born fool" grapha said fondling coldi's breasts ,moving her hand under her skirt feeling the untapped potential between her legs. Coldi struggled to free herself but was paralyzed not only with magic... but fear of being violated.

"Get off!" Coldi shouted to her assailant. Grapha laughed making her taste the nectar from her pure maidenhood. It bitter as she made forced her fingers down her throat gagging as she did...

"I just want a taste" grapha said placing her lips on coldi's. As she moved her tongue savoring her flavor of old fish chews, grapha began to feel cold... frozen even. She found she could not move frozen in place, as coldi broke off her hand freeing herself from her molester's frozen grip.

"Its my curse... any contact with my lips and enough time... and you will be frozen. I warned you did I not... but you are a fabulous kisser" coldi said taking her belongings after leaning her against the wall slightly enough for when she would fall and shatter, "a fitting end for one such as her "coldi thought

[raging_monkey]

Act 184: referral

Spoiler

months had past since her expulsion coldi laid in her bed, depressed at how her future was cut short by a shrew of a woman controlled by her lust. Her parents reminded her daily of how she had brought them shame.

She lit her pipe filled with elfroot to ease her mind taking long drags and blowing it through her nose. "Damn... " she said staring at her pet birds that chirped. She took the cage to her window releasing them,hoping that a cat wouldn't eat them. She felt trapped wondering if she should have just slept with grapha,the she stood on the window "it's a big fall... why not" she said considering jumping. she heard the door knock. "Its open..."

The door opened showing alessandra entering. She scanned the room seeing coldi teeter on the edge. "Its a long fall and you won't die.. you will just have a few broken bones" she said sitting in the chair. Coldi wondered how she could be so relaxed seeing her attempt suicide.. let alone how she found her.

"Why are you here..." she said stepping from the window and sitting across from her.

"A friendly visit and a slight proposal" alessandra said pulling a screwdriver and odd device from her belt,tinkering with it as waited for response. Coldi noticed her odd habit of tinkering with objects while she talked or ate,it was a curious thing she thought.

"And what do I have to do in return for this boon you offer " coldi said her tone slightly caustic from the last time someone wanted to help her.

Alessandra ignored the remark tinkering still with her item swearing quietly as she stripped the screw by accident. "Nothing but listen. The former first enchanter has been stripped of his rank as well exiled from his house. He currently lives at this residence. "

"Okay good for him what's that got to do with me?" Coldi asked

"He currently needs a apprentice to keep him out of trouble. The lad is a beacon for it now if you drop my name I'm sure he will take you in. Since your family is how do I say it.... indisposed " alessandra said still face deep in her work.

"Great a perverted old man... I'll pass" coldi said hastily

Alessandra chuckled at how she called her friend old. "Haha fear not he's not much older than you and is married,among other things. And he's the author of that book you stole from the library "

Coldi rushed to her pillow getting the book from her bed, pressing it against alessandra's face. "YOU MEAN THAT MONKAI RAGIN IS MY MASTER NOW!" She shouted in excitement. She had developed a extreme fascination with his work during each of his lectures or related topics. She considered him his number one fan.

"The one and the same "alessandra said gently pushing the book from her personal space.

Coldi jumped up and down thanking her and the maker for the chance to study her magic again and began to pack her bag with clothes,books and her cache of elfroot. Intent on starting her new life. "I'll make a grand entrance he will have to take me" she said rushing.

"Just be their later today he hates being woken up.." alessandra said after coldi took the directions to her future master's manor, running off indifferent to her advice.

XXx

Coldi sat in her room putting her quil away and smelled the ink dry. "Not a bad start to the memoirs of coldi ragin right little ones"coldi said to her wisps as they bounced in agreement sounding like they wanted to know more

[raging_monkey]

Act 185: spark of rebellion

Spoiler

monkai read the journals Galatea had stolen from caius's study,they were mostly business reports,ventures ,and other miscellaneous subjects. Only three struck out among the irrelevant them ... it made monkai laugh at the irony and hypocrisy placing them between the shelves only her would know where to be used for a later point as insurance.

Zera walked into the study savoring what time they had left. She was formally dressed but forgoed any of her typical red make up. "Don't you look homley. Planning on going like that" monkai teased putting the last journal away.

"Don't act all high and mighty you dress slovenly all the time" zera said playfully slapping monkai. She noticed how he had changed his coat and begun wearing the sleeves,he looked rather dashing.

"Well I do dress casual " monkai laughed taking her arm into his. "Ready love... might be our last engagement.. "

Zera kissed his cheek "I'll be damned if I marry anyone else and if either you give up ... I swear I'll be so cross you'd wish my father said no " she said her voice burning with passion. "We will find a way to be together "

Xxx

The Vallinous manor was a bustle with the elite of tevinter, scions old old houses and new gossiped about the groom and bride. Speaking of the soon to be alliance between houses carcella and vallinous.

Cassia stood at the altar with zera, miri,and coldi as the maids of honour. Coldi winked at hotus taking a fancy to him after their late dinner. The main door opened as batzas entered ,walking to his bride he was overjoyed not by his bride but by how was walking without ill effects from his procedure months before. He saw monkai hide amongst the shadow wishing to speak to him after the ceremony.

The priest stood between cassia and batzas blessings their union as the crowd clapped as they said "I do"

Xxx

Caius danced with his daughter proud that his daughter followed with his plan and secured anew power base he was closer to his mad plan of consolidating his power "soon I will rule this nation and forge a empire that will last millennium " he thought to himself as the music switched tempo allowing the bride and groom to dance.

Batzas polity extended his hand to cassia, asking to dance. Their movements mirrored each others, hers graceful and precise his practical and cumbersome. "Your a wonderful dancer "batzas said

"I can not say the same of yours" cassia said as she was brought low then back up. She couldn't help but smile at how he took the lead. She was happy that her father's plan was progressing well,but did expect to develop feelings for her new groom, expecting it to pass as she planned her next moves for her own plans.

"Haha we may be bound by politics beyond our control. But that doesn't preclude us from friendship yes?" Batzas said finishing the dance.

Cassia chuckled at his nativity "perhaps best to prove useful first... husband "

Xxx

"Why is he here I gave you leave to see not invite him to a family matter! " caius said keeping his voice low so not to disrupt the gathering.

"Batzas invited him and you don't own him. And I'm a already allowing your hotus to spy on me. Be grateful I didn't cut his throat. "Zera hissed discarding what ever formality they shared.

"Zera Listen to reason he will be the death of you. I will not allow it! " caius said his voice stern. Zera scoffed at his freigned attempt at concern, trying to force his old world duty on to her.

"Don't ever see me again... we are done... I'll help your little play date if only to protect my man from your madness but I won't stay and I never wish to see you again. your not the man who raised me... just a tyrant stuck in his old ways blind to see his actions " zera said walking away to see cassia laugh and giggle with miri and coldi. She smiled at how her sister found whatever happiness in her duty.

Caius masked his pain at her words as she left genuinely hurt that his favored child said such. "You don't know.. my child... I'm doing this for you.. " he said breathing slowly to cover his pain.

XXx

Batzas walked toward monkai who leaned against the ledger muttering to himself. "Ah milord ragin been some time yes " he said awkwardly gesturing, remembering the power that lied within him.

"Hey gratis... or should I call you batzas " monkai said not turning to look at him.

Batzas walked to beside him bowing polity "I'm glad you could come despite the mild tension. I just wanted to give thanks for the gift you gave me"

Monkai grunted in indifference as he went on about his life, smoking his pipe waiting until something of merit came. "And I have a message from my mother she wishes to see you three days from tomorrow. "

Monkai blew smoke from his nose knowing his plan was coming fold

[Serelir]

Aww, I like Batzas! I hope Cassia doesn't mistreat him.

 

Looks like Caius might need a new heir.

[raging_monkey]

Nah it's too early for complete dismissal. For all caius's faults he's a family man he will find a way he always does. Uccio opened a giant can of worms for caius full of subtext and metaphor, it's a amazing dynamic caius has with his COD and how it translates into his actions. In purpose he wants what's best for his kids to have them want or need for nothing but the way he does it is aloof or maccivellian that pushes people away with every inch he makes.

My intent/interpretation with caius is to slowly make him a tragic/human character while slowly shift monkai into caius. A reversal of fates if you will.


* skims can for fishing bait this weekend * what it's expensive for bait nowadays

EDITED for clarification due to thinking faster than I can type