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[TheTechnoTurian]

 ATTENTION BSN!  This thread contains lots of Turian. And Eboob. And eboob getting fondled by a Turian 

 

 

With my fat glorious Turian Sentinel and the Arc Pistol, I have taken a tour of the galaxy!

 

When I saw TheNightSlasher sub-20 all maps in the game with the DAI and Alquinn sub-20 several of them with the HFI, I wondered if it was possible for the  Glorious Fat Turian Sentinel no-dodge. I was doubtful when I started, but fat Turian proved my skepticism was unfounded.

 

While not as fast as those kits, the fat turian dutifully waddled his way to sub-20 victory on every map in the game. Like I usually do when I play with turians, I filmed it and wanted to share the solos here in case anyone is interested.

 

Unfortunately, because of some hardware problems that occurred during this process, a lot of these videos are 480p/standard definition, so apologies in advance for the mostly potato quality. Hopefully some may find a few to be of interest regardless of the poor quality. 

 

For science, I have marked with an asterisk (*) which ones were completed without objective modding; the rest were done with modding for triple pizzas. inb4inevitablederail

 

Most of these are Cerberus with a few geth thrown in. I find reapers and collectors tedious and don't like soloing them. All are arc pistol except Glacier Hazard, which features a guest appearance by the Geth Plasma Shotgun. 

 

Without further delay, I present: Fat Turian Does the Milky Way.

 

14:29 | 10 WS | Glacier | Cerberus

17:59 | 10 WS |  White | Geth 

19:14 | 10 WS | Giant | Cerberus*

18:05 | Ghost | Cerberus*

19:13 | Dagger | Cerberus

19:55 | 10 WS |  Reactor | Cerberus

 

18:08 | 10 WS | ☣Glacier☣ | Geth (feat. Geth Plasma Shotgun) 

17:02 | ☣White☣ | Geth 

18:18 | 10 WS | ☣Giant☣ | Cerberus

19:05 | 10 WS | ☣Ghost☣ | Cerberus

18:17 | ☣Dagger☣| Cerberus

19:35 | ☣Reactor☣ | Cerberus* - screenshot only. 

 

19:41 | Goddess | Cerberus*

19:29 | Jade | Cerberus*

17:21 | 10 WS | Hydra | Cerberus 

18:32 | Condor | Cerberus 

 

19:28 | 10 WS | London | Cerberus*

18:30 | Vancouver | Cerberus

19:08 | 10 WS | Rio | Cerberus 

 

My Classic Fat Tech-Armor Turian Build  

Link to the Playlist

 

Bonus Hot Fat Turian Solos: 

all solos done w/o modded objectives, includes various challenges and platinum solos. 

 

18:13 | Glacier | Geth (feat. Carnifex)

19:00 | 10 WS | Glacier | Cerberus (feat. PPR)

19:13 | 10 WS | Glacier | Geth (feat. Executioner Pistol) 

Fat Turian Speedruns Platinum 

Fat Turian Does Cerberus Platinum with the PPR 

Fat Turian Does Condor Platinum 

Fat Turian Does Rio Platinum 

Fat Turian Does London Platinum 

Fat Turian Does Crappy Objectives on Platinum 

 

Hot Fat Turian Soldier: Gentleman and Scholar (A Platinum Solo With the Other Fat Turian)

 

And with that, I can safely conclude: I like Turians! 

[TheNightSlasher]

Fantastic stuff!

 

Looks like the turian was quite gentle to you during the galaxy tour.

[FasterThanFTL]

Impressive.

[Tupari]

This is fat and ridiculous stuff, I'm impressed. Great job. 

[Shinobu]

Amazing! Glorious fat turians!

[Mgamerz]

Now do old glacier/white and the unreleased maps.

[BloodBeforeTears]

My Classic Fat Tech-Armor Turian Build  

 

I don't think I will ever understand why you did not take chain overload for evo 4.  Please explain.

[TheTechnoTurian]

I don't think I will ever understand why you did not take chain overload for evo 4.  Please explain.

 

I do, just clicked the wrong thing in kalence. 

[Mordokai]

Dammit Techno, I was planning on doing something vaguely productive today... and now I'm gonna spend half the day watching your fat turian doing the galaxy.

 

Great work as always. And if you ever decide for one of your asari to, ahem... do the galaxy... you won't hear me complaining

[ROBOTICSUPERMAN]

Tsent ftw!
Great character
Here's mine
http://kalence.drupa...24257364!500A5O
Sporting a Geth plasma rifle, incendiary ammo, triple overload and warp he has the opportunity for mass fire explosions and can cheese it if he gets in too deep

[Darth Volus]

Still too fat 

[PresidentVorchaMasterBaits]

FAT TURIANS NEED TO BURN OFF SOME FAT! VORCHA WILL GLADLY HELP WITH THAT! GRRRRAAAAAAAAAGGHH!!!

[Alfonsedode]

Glorious !

[PatrickBateman]

Amazing game play Techno.

[ClydeInTheShell]

I've probably said this a ton of times, but Techno, you're a relentless savage. 

[SwoopIM]

Inspiring gameplay!  Techno, you sure know how to "handle" your Turians.

[TheTechnoTurian]

Now do old glacier/white and the unreleased maps.

 

Hmmm, interesting, might give old glacier/white a shot. Unreleased maps though, playing on checkerboards gives me a headache so not any time soon... 

[TheTechnoTurian]

Still too fat 

 

A turian can never be too fat for me 

[BioticPulse]

Very very impressive!!!

Have bookmarked this as I will propably never be tired of seing Turians smash everything. Turians r indeed fat & glorious & in ur hands they truly shine in performance :-D

Lolsub20!! Prove that I am & will always b a noob at this game :-)

[ReadingRambo220]

Impressive! One of my all time favorite classes. He proves fatties can be elegant too.

I assume he stayed in hostels in between missions during this tour?

[GruntKitterhand]

 

19:14 | 10 WS | Giant | Cerberus*

 

 

The things you do to Phantoms in this quickened my pulse somewhat, as did your little dance with 30 seconds left till extraction. Glorious Fatness - who needs a dodge when you have TECH ARMOR?!?

 

[TheTechnoTurian]

Impressive! One of my all time favorite classes. He proves fatties can be elegant too.

I assume he stayed in hostels in between missions during this tour?

 

There is nothing more elegant and graceful than a huge fat tech armor turian. 

 

everywhere he went Fat Turian was offered a place to stay the night by his many female fans of various species, not that i blame them 

[Smehur]

Awesome stuff, Techno, you're a true hero of the Hierarchy. Hope the tales of this epic voyage will reach the Primarch's ears, I bet he'll want to name a whole legion after you.

[Excella Gionne]

Mmm, excellent!

[1badmage]

20 headshots by round 2 on glacier -- nice!