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[Madmoe77]

We have the immortal word of Divine David Gaider saying that the story of Dragon Age is the story of Thedas. The Dragon Age Setting.

 

Well Thedas as a character is suffering greatly then! Worse than any Warden, Hawke or Inquisitor ever could.

 

We will start with the Vampiric relationship The People have with the Titans first. The Titan seem to be living land masses. They are in a symbiotic union with the children of the stone. Those little caretakers found a nice little living mining the very blood of the host!

 

Elves lined up for it! Humans lined up for it! Now even the Qunari are force feeding their mages Titan blood. Blood magic is the literal potency of the Titan and sadly the very thing placing a target on it's mountainous back.

 

Even Thedas' sky is not safe! Spirits draw on it. Mages draw from it. (Dragons do all sorts of stuff in it! Where are water dragons by the way?)

 

The sky got so screwed that it was driven into three parts. Not atmospheric parts mind you! Literal separation in the form of the blue sky, the Veil and the Fade beyond.

 

Old Elven lore refer to a particular character as The Sun. The Sun! And he had a very bad day. One very long bad day.

 

In Dragon Age Inquisition alone, Thedas had a hole torn in it's sky, a Titan with a belly ache wrecking the Storm Coast and by the Trespasser DLC we ended up with all of the parasites zipping around using mirrors to rain holy hell on each other using Titan blood cocktails fighting for some control over the blood addicted masses!

 

Literally, Thedas bleeds for the mages!

Dwarves make money off of this.

Qunari would enslave all of Thedas only to realize that maybe the Titan's are ultra magy! Let's bind them too.

Humans? Humans can't decide where they fit in this blood sucking scenario. They exhibit enough of the behaviors equally.

Elves! Hahaha they apparently knew all of this and didn't care! Talk about your apathetically aware tick!

 

I'm waiting to find out the Fex have done something terrible to the water! Thedas watch your water!

 

Consume, consume, consume. I'm feeling peckish. Which parasite should I role play next?     

[Andromelek]

First, do not blame dwarves for being parasites, Titans created them on that way and they actually allow them to take their blood, otherwise the Rock Wraith would have kicked the Sha-Brytol's arses, if the other species buy it to boost their mages is often to optimize their connection with the Fade (they wouldn't need that if certain person wouldn't put the Veil there) and not every mage needs to use lyrium or blood magic to be skilled if Qunari used lyrium to boost their Saarebas was because they are too lazy to train them and thought would be a good idea make them a giant living bomb.

Second the Breach was on the sky but that doesn't means the Fade and the Spirits are on the sky, actually there can be a tear of the Veil even underground.

I agree with the third point, whatever the Sun was, I think it certainly wasn't a moron like the evanuirs.

[Nixou]

Most of Thedas is ruled by a caste of mostly inept feudal lords.

Before that, it was ruled by a caste of corrupt blood-magic-weaving sybaritic Magisters.

And even before that it was ruled by a caste of evil, immortal, would-be God-Kings

 

Of Course it has a parasite problem.

[vertigomez]

Welp, people do similar things to Earth, so...

[Madmoe77]

Yeah I'm from the Southern US and draining the Earth dry of oil is a thing most praise down here. It's not right fellas!

 

On the dwarf note! If they were a common bacteria that evolved in the blood of Titan's to filter something from them like the taint, then they can be redeemed. If not they are intestinal worms at best! lol Something either expelled or eventually causing dietary issues galore.

 

So theory; Elves needed lyrium wine for great dreaming and eventually caused anemia in the Titans. Mythal was actually mother nature and saw this as bad. She put on her nurse hat and went to work eliminating the icky stuff in Titan blood. What's that! Too late?

 

Titan's got sick and dwarves got 'expelled' or got sick with the host. Blight! Oh knows! Magisters tapped into this and ended up in the black city-bowel of a Titan-now covered in taint. Can't get that stuff out of anything! "I got the Titan pooh all over me!"

 

"The seat of the Maker was empty! Only darkness and taint remained!" Corypuss (paraphrasing) That's taint literal! It was taco Tuesday before they arrived. Beans in-dwarves out! What?

 

It was so bad in Thedas that the sky opened up a personal cloud over the Titan. Breaching more nasty everywhere.

 

It's a good thing the calling is a sound and not a smell. Word games being what they are-we could have ended up with a gnarly Monty Python sketch!    

[Master Warder Z_]

Most of Thedas is ruled by a caste of mostly inept feudal lords.
Before that, it was ruled by a caste of corrupt blood-magic-weaving sybaritic Magisters.
And even before that it was ruled by a caste of evil, immortal, would-be God-Kings

Of Course it has a parasite problem.

Gaspard is a surprising exception

[Madmoe77]

No sympathy for Thedas? If Thedas had a face this would be the talk of the boards! Instead it's defend the d-uh-warves! Blame the ruling populace! 

 

Poor handsome Thedas!  

 

Thedas romance? That's assuming there isn't some communicable disease worse than the blight one may get.  

 

*In all sincerity I'm not trolling. Lighthearted threads can be fun too. Consider it an opportunity to join the Drink-quisition?