1. I never said every aug has to have a noticeable effect on the character's appearance, please point out where I said every aug has to have a noticeable visual component? At this point it seems like you are arguing for the sake of arguing looking for whatever small nitpick you can throw at the idea no matter how irrelevant it is to the conversation. That said I am sure there would be plenty of augmentations that would have a noticeable visual component.
Then I'll hammer in on the really important bits:
Adam, right off the start, is augmented to the point where it's obvious he's extensively machine. In other words: your change in appearance has diminishing returns.
2. It does not matter if these augmentations are never mentioned by NPCs in the world the important thing is I think it would be nice to see some sort of visual change that reflects choices made by the player. Adam is already visibly augmented to the point it is obvious that he is extensively machine because that was the design decision made by the developers, they could have just as easily had Jensen change over time as he is forced to get more and more augmentations over the course of the game (of course this would require a little more work) but instead they took the lazy route and just said "oh all your augmentations are installed from the beginning only you cant use em all yet because you need to use praxis points to unlock them for some reason".
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I don't think you're on firm footing to talk about lazy routes, considering you're defending a feature where "reactivity" is maybe 3-4 npc's making half-joke response about dragon tattoos, at the expense of a character creator. Of course, if you want to offer to pay for all those extra fun examples reactivity, all the more power to you. But that should probably factor into your calculations before calling the devs lazy.
And sure, more reactivity is always nice, except when it's not. Case in point: the Dark Brotherhood references in Skyrim. More than likely, that is what your scenario is going to get end with, in particular because most visual features in Bioware games aren't unique enough to have extended conversations about, beyond the most basic race/gender options. Hence why I emphasized much the same with Human Revolution, where being augmented is enough to place you in a completely different category of person.
And I am constantly pointing out to you that the reactivity you get from pre-defined backgrounds is even more pointless and irrelevant to the player. Do you honestly not see the parallels here? At least the hail Sithis comments reflect a choice made by the player and at least comments based on visual appearance are relevant to the player as they can actually see their character's visual appearance, comments about past experiences that the player never gets to experience and does not know about until they are brought up have no relevance to the player at all and only serve as a reminded that it is not their character that they are playing.
Putting aside of course that you actively get to choose, play through, and comment on those backgrounds, particularly in regards to DA:O. Explain in detail, how a pre-generated Origin, which you got to choose and actively experience, is irrelevant to the player when you are defending a concept where your backstory cannot be expressed in any meaningful sense. Like I said above, your character concept is down there with DA:O's coward role-playing concept.
The Hail Sithis comment also should never have even happened in the first place, given the context of what the Dark Brotherhood is all about. More accurately, it's the game attempting to break the 4th wall, which ideally should be minimized.
And I should point out how problematic it is that every character still wants to jump your character's bones despite looking like this
And the path of least resistance is....not to make a ridiculous looking character. That issue is solvable rather easily. On the other end of the spectrum, we also have a Bioware that loves letting you bond with companion characters, to the point where it's a key bit of advertising. In the context of your no pre-defined backgrounds, that becomes a bit difficult though when the PC was for all intents and purposes born the day the adventure started.
The fact that other characters can't comment on your appearance is a concession that must be made to allow character creation, the fact that your character can't comment on specific events in their past that happen before the game begins is a concession that must be made to allow the player more freedom in defining who their character is.
It looks like you're going for the analogy, excluding one giant hole in this point.
Let's go back to the thought experiments using your analogy. We make 2 characters, mostly the same in every respect, except one has black hair and the other has brown hair. They make all the same choices/dialogue options and everything plays out the same.
Now, we make 2 characters, exact same appearance, but with radically different backgrounds. One of them, a Femshep, lost her father when she was very little to an assassin, but still somehow finds herself romancing Thane. The other, has had a completely normal backstory, but both are forced to have the exact same responses, despite radically different circumstances.
If that's the "price you're paying" for role-playing freedom, it doesn't sound like you're getting a great deal. That's where your arguments fall apart. The analogy only works if you treat those two quantities as maintaining equal importance in terms of believable interactions, hence why I keep pointing out to you how much more difficult it would be to live your life without referencing 20+ years of experience than it would be to avoid comment on people's appearance. If the game never draws attention to the fact that you made a character with black vs. brown hair, while that may show a "lack of reactivity", it's no worse a concept than what we could achieve in day to day life. Now try that with your character concept and let's see how far that goes.
Maybe you'll come back and say "but look how ridiculous I made that character!" and that's where I'd again point out that this is easily circumvented by not making characters that you concede are utterly ridiculous. I can't think of many character concepts where no one says a single thing about his past, ever. None that I'd be interested in playing, anyway.
I am pretty sure even if somebody is not willing to talk about a tragic event in their past that happened long ago it would not be much of an issue for them to talk about the things that happened the day before if they weren't traumatic, hell perhaps your character suffered a head injury that prevents him from recalling events that happen more than 2 days ago? If not being able to reference your character's past is such a problem for you I am sure there are plenty of ways you could headcanon why he isn't able to reference that past.
No, you're falling into the same trap, just with a different backstory now. If that's my character's backstory, I should be able to tell people "hey, I can't remember my past, what the hell happened?" or express some interest/effort in understanding what happened with my background. Which coincidentally Planescape: Torment pulls off pretty well.
I am not sure why you think referencing the past is such a vital part of a roleplaying game? There are plenty of people who get along fine without boring everyone else about their life story at every given opportunity so I don't see why it is must that the main character should be able to bore other characters with their life story especially given how little relevance it has to the player?
Maybe your character has unresolved parent issues, just like most other Bioware characters? Maybe it's a way to develop a closer relationship with your companions/romance options since, you know, people tend to talk about themselves with people they're close to. Maybe, just maybe, it makes a character feel more alive than simply functioning as a doll, oblivious to his environment. Expressing different ideas and emotions through dialogue and actions tends to be kinda important for role-playing, believe it or not. I appreciate that you're trying to brush this under the rug with "Pfft, your life story is boring!". But that's what's odd about this: a character backstory doesn't have to be boring. But with your approach to game design, it's guaranteed to be irrelevant.