please give us the option to turn it off.
Just give me the option to turn it off (or on!)
This has come up quite a bit.
The problem with using a toggle is that it more than doubles the QA required for everything that is impacted by the toggle. In the case of a game that spends more than average resources on cutscenes, this amounts to a very significant increase in development time and costs.
At the moment, the only development scenarios where the toggle is considered economically viable are the ones where including it allows the game to receive a rating that makes it friendlier towards a target audience. For a game like Brutal Legend, a blood/violence toggle allows the game to be easily marketed to young people, making the increased sales cover the additional QA and development expense.
In the case of BioWare, they are content to have a the "M" rating, and don't seem to spend much marketing to kids. The toggle wouldn't pay for itself with increased sales. And since it isn't a question of whether the material is appropriate for the rating, they have made the decision to forgo toggles.
Anything could happen in the next few years, with new IPs, or perhaps a shift in the direction of existing ones. But when it comes to Mass Effect and Dragon Age, the developers have said that they intend to include those scenes, and that they won't be implementing any content toggles.
For now, there's not much you can do if you plan to play the game except to forgo romance dialogue or turn away when the scene happens.