I know RPGs have the option of choose gender
I was refering not only RPGs: i.e. first new Tomb Raider you have a sutil rapey scene. Heavy Rain? The parts where you play as Paige, you have PLENTY of rapeys scenes. In Beyond Two Souls? More rapeyscenes (hell, David Cage, YOU have a problem!). Hell, even in The Last of us Ellie has her own rapey scene (however, at least the treatment is better than the other examples). Altough things are changing, most of the time your protagonist is gonna be male.
About RPGs, I don't have to much experience apart from Bioware games, but even in DA:O I had to put Sten in his place because the Warden was a woman 
I think we can all agree David Cage has some issues, so moving on =P
It's a bit silly to make comparisons to "every encounter with an Asari" because one scene with Lara in the new TR is a bit rapey or Sten has one conversation about women in the Qun.
Things are changing? Let's talk about the top RPGs and Action RPGs of the last 2 years and what gender the PC is:
Fallout 4 - Lets you choose
Pillars of Eternity - Lets you choose
Shadowrun: Hong Kong - Lets you choose
The Witcher 3 - Mostly playing as Geralt(male). A couple of bits as Ciri(female).
Dragon Age: Inquisition - Lets you choose
Divinity: Original Sin - Lets you choose for 2 characters.
Wasteland 2 - Lets you choose for 4 characters
South Park: The Stick of Truth - Male only
Bloodborne - Lets you choose
Having played most of the games on that list, I can also say they don't feature terrible treatment of female characters.
it helps a lot though. Trust me.
Having trained in martial arts for 7 years, proper form and agility are far more important. Nobody trained is going to throw their full strength behind a punch in a real fight because you'd throw yourself off balance if it didn't connect.
The main thing my size and physical strength got me an advantage in was intimidating people new to sparring.
Maybe in an untrained street brawl, but I'm assuming that Shep has actual hand to hand training.