I actually want to raise a further point based on the email I mentioned in my original post. Being openly gay and comfortable with that fact does NOT mean having sex. The media needs to get over it and stop making promiscuous gays to show how 'open' they are. Literally a simple "Well I've never had sex but I just know i'm gay", I knew I was gay soon after reaching puberty even though I didn't have a word for it back then and from the age of 16 onward it was a process of simply telling friends and family I liked men sexuality and not women, that does NOT mean I went around trying to find people to sleep with just to 'prove' something. The closest thing Bioware has done with that was with Dorian where most of the random people he slept with was just annoy his father, really? Come on. Being comfortable with ones sexuality and being promiscuous are mutually exclusive and Bioware (along with all media) needs to stop chaining gay people up with that idea.
When I talk about this issue with my close friends they always joke "Well how else are people supposed to know they're gay if they aren't slutty?" and it really is a massive sad joke the media keeps playing on gay people. People aren't stupid, my example above of ""Well I've never had sex but I just know i'm gay" will quite literally let people know the person is gay. Bioware really needs to stop using this stereotype for all it's gay and bi men.
In all honesty, on that count, I'm less concerned with Mass Effect than I am with Dragon Age. Maybe it's just that Kaidan and Steve in ME3 were the only options, but they were good at countering this - Steve had been in a committed monogamous relationship, and Kaidan's romance lock-in talks specifically about how he's not in many relationships. I still have concerns, given that getting just M/M relationships in the game was like pulling teeth, dragging them, kicking and screaming the whole way, but the 'promiscuous gay' seems less of a thing in Mass Effect. Granted, that's still a sample size of one game out of three, but I'm taking my positives where I find them right now.
Dragon Age, though... They are LOUSY with this trope. Zevran and Iron Bull both talk about their sexual histories, and Fenris/M!Hawke is the only M/M pairing that doesn't at some point imply one or both parties enjoys even light bondage (Zevran and Dorian both offer unprompted comments about rope, in the context of being tied up, and a purple!Hawke brings up 'other uses' for chains in MotA), so there's this really overused idea that M/M sex is inherently kinky.