Aller au contenu

Photo

Beware of Zevran's massage


129 réponses à ce sujet

#76
tigrina

tigrina
  • Members
  • 771 messages

imported_beer wrote...

Mueller86 wrote...

What the heck? I like Zevran but he never offered any massages. What does this mean? Am I not desirable?


Is this even possible?

Zevran hits on everybody. Why did he leave you out?

[stares suspiciously]


It is actually. When you say at your 'first meeting' that he shouldn't flirt. Damn hard to get your rep up with him though that way.
**
Thanks for the good laugh all

#77
Khimber

Khimber
  • Members
  • 15 messages
As a male PC I slept with everyone possible and never got any negative conversations from the any of them. I mean, I slept with Lel, Zev and Morrigan all within 10 minutes and never got anything negative. Hmmm, I must be so good how could they possibly object?

#78
ChickenDownUnder

ChickenDownUnder
  • Members
  • 1 028 messages
You poor bastard.

#79
AtreiyaN7

AtreiyaN7
  • Members
  • 8 396 messages

Deviija wrote...

Purple Lady wrote...

Cat Lance wrote...

Zejoph wrote...

David Gaider wrote...

Uh-huh.

*snip
Just saying. Posted Image


<3David Gaider is my hero.<3

Seconded! :wub:


Thirded.


Fourth'ded.  ;D  Clearly, the only reason why Zev was put into the game was to trick bi-curious and naive heterosexual dudes.  :P


Fifthed! :wizard:

#80
SleepyBird

SleepyBird
  • Members
  • 206 messages
Oh dear god this thread cracks me up.  You poor poor naive boy.  I think you need some more men like Zevron in your life to wisen you up a bit.  Or maybe just learn to pay attention to what people are saying to you?  ;)

#81
Milky Way

Milky Way
  • Members
  • 81 messages
If he offered you a massage, then you must have accepted has flirtations early on. You didn't notice when he called you a handsome man? That's pretty hilarious you didn't notice all the way until Zevran did the deed.



The response "Dear Maker, please don't tell anyone else" when you talk to Leliana looks really appropriate for your character.

#82
Dunhart

Dunhart
  • Members
  • 276 messages
Your mind said no but your body said yes.

#83
MusukoYo

MusukoYo
  • Members
  • 32 messages
I wonder how the OP would navigate this particular exchange. :whistle:

Posted Image

#84
OneBadAssMother

OneBadAssMother
  • Members
  • 1 086 messages
ROFL @ Thread, you know there has to be a community sticky that lists all the great threads for laughs. Btw...



This thread makes me fear for the poster's experiences later in life :)




Hahahaha!!!!

#85
Lotion Soronarr

Lotion Soronarr
  • Members
  • 14 481 messages
Remeber - it's not gay if it's an elf.

#86
Korva

Korva
  • Members
  • 2 122 messages

Dark83 wrote...

dark_dragon99 wrote...

Not often i find myself thinking about what to say in a game but as this is a bioware game i have to. Or i'll end up getting screwed in the end. And in this game you really have to watch it

SupidSeep wrote...

Lucky me. The way he mentioned a massage hinted at something not so innocent and I made an excuse to get him off ...

Drat, there's no rimshot emote here.

...wow, I didn't even intend that double entendre. :innocent:


I read the thread earlier, snickered at those double entendres, and wondered if someone would point them out as I wasn't quite feeling dirty-minded enough to do it myself. Glad I wasn't disappointed. :D

#87
Ron Brugal

Ron Brugal
  • Members
  • 127 messages
surprise butsec

#88
LemuresXL

LemuresXL
  • Members
  • 188 messages
I was happy when Zevran turned on me. Was nice putting down the little taco bell dog. Honestly, annoying character. Not quite as bad as Morrigan though.

#89
LaughingDragon

LaughingDragon
  • Members
  • 211 messages
I wonder...will Bioware will be the recipient of any lawsuits...

Can anyone else see someone innocently playing this game...sitting in their chair... oh hi Zevran...hows it going...next thing you know, they're character is bent over in a tent after a gay massage surprise attack.... oh the horror...

For some, that may constitute emotional pain and suffering and mental anguish! Permanent psychological damage! ruh oh!

This could lead to the ESRB issuing a new  warning sticker on games... "Sexually confused content"

Modifié par LaughingDragon, 09 décembre 2009 - 10:23 .


#90
syllogi

syllogi
  • Members
  • 7 251 messages
Even Alistair recognizes the perils inherent in a massage offered by Zevran. That elf is a public menace.

#91
Jacks-Up

Jacks-Up
  • Members
  • 583 messages

David Gaider wrote...

Uh-huh.

So let's see, shall we?

Zevran: "My thought is this: We retire to your tent and I show you the sort of massage skills that one only learns growing up in an Antivan ****house."

PC: "That sounds good to me."

Zevran: "A willing victim it is. And if I might ask, if the opportunity to proceed past the massage should present itself...?"

PC: "I'll leave that up to you."

...I suppose that someone can protest that they didn't see what was coming. and HONESTLY thought it was just a simple massage, but that sounds to me like the kind of lame excuse they'd best save for when their girlfriend walks in halfway through the cutscene.

Just saying. Posted Image


Kinda how I look at it.  Really no different then the guy that "Accidentally"  Walks into a gay bathroom stall 20 times over.

"I'm not gay really I was just tricked every time"  Sure buddy

#92
Creature 1

Creature 1
  • Members
  • 2 163 messages

LaughingDragon wrote...

I wonder...will Bioware will be the recipient of any lawsuits...

Can anyone else see someone innocently playing this game...sitting in their chair... oh hi Zevran...hows it going...next thing you know, they're character is bent over in a tent after a gay massage surprise attack.... oh the horror...

For some, that may constitute emotional pain and suffering and mental anguish! Permanent psychological damage! ruh oh!

This could lead to the ESRB issuing a new  warning sticker on games... "Sexually confused content"

As a potentially mitigating factor, I believe unless your character is an elf the player character is top. 

I guess things just got out of control.  Kind of a Brokeback Mountain experience.  

#93
barrel_LOL

barrel_LOL
  • Members
  • 17 messages
This was never the way I planned -- not my intention!
I got so brave, drink in hand -- lost, my discretion;
It's not what, I'm used to -- just wanna try him on;
I'm curious, for a back rub -- caught. My. Attention;

I KISSED AN ELF, AND I LIKED IT, THE TASTE OF HIS CHERRY ARSE-CHAPS -- I KISSED AN ELF JUST TO TRY IT; HOPE MY GUILDIES DON'T MIND IT!

#94
SSH83

SSH83
  • Members
  • 126 messages
Even when i play as a female PC i can't stand hearing the romance dialogue. It just feels really...



Maybe that's a testament to the writing and acting of the dialogues?

#95
Mr7.7

Mr7.7
  • Members
  • 12 messages
How could you not know!

Zeveran whole purpose in the game is to serve as eye candy for the female gamers(and the gay dudes aswell).

What an awful character, thank god bioware didn't make him a female,otherwise this forum would be filled with complaints about the character . (anyone who followed the forums before mass effect came out would admit this).

#96
RunCDFirst

RunCDFirst
  • Members
  • 563 messages
:lol:

Oh you guys.  

#97
CJohnJones

CJohnJones
  • Members
  • 232 messages
Zevran always likes to have a happy ending.

#98
PinkShira

PinkShira
  • Members
  • 267 messages

GuerrillaDawg wrote...

When he asks to massage you , he ment a little more.

I found out the hard way ........with my male character


I have to admit I had a good laugh at this. I also had a little snicker at the word "hard" being used by the OP as well. :whistle:

#99
andysdead

andysdead
  • Members
  • 459 messages

dark_dragon99 wrote...

Or i'll end up getting screwed in the end.


indeed.  lol

#100
Rhys Cordelle

Rhys Cordelle
  • Members
  • 951 messages
Cheer up love. You'll get your ending. Once he gets his... end...in...

Modifié par Rhys Cordelle, 09 décembre 2009 - 11:29 .