10369 réponses à ce sujet

[Tarante11a]

Actually that reminds me! Because my Cousland was a total tart, I'd been romancing both Al and Zev. I was about to get into a big fight in the ruins on my way to get the Urn and I accidentally clicked on Al. Whereupon, in front of about 10 cultists, he has this deep and meaningful conversation with me about what was going on with me and Zev etc. It was quite funny but I had to do a reload. It just wasn't right!

[Tasmen]

Tarante11a wrote...

Actually that reminds me! Because my Cousland was a total tart, I'd been romancing both Al and Zev. I was about to get into a big fight in the ruins on my way to get the Urn and I accidentally clicked on Al. Whereupon, in front of about 10 cultists, he has this deep and meaningful conversation with me about what was going on with me and Zev etc. It was quite funny but I had to do a reload. It just wasn't right!

Their timing can be quite..inappropriate at times, eh? :innocent:

[westiex9]

Tarante11a wrote...

@Shadow - for some reason, that gives me a strange Pythonesque image of a knight kneeling down in offal, plighting his troth to his lady fair. *squelch*

Ooh how about this one:

As you tear through the innards of the high dragon that swallowed both you and alistair you burst from its stomach, a sea of gore flooding the snow outside. And then alistair takes you in his arms and smeared in the blood,stomach acid and other unmentionable substances of the dragons belly kisses you passionatly at which point the young cousland runs screaming from him 

[Tasmen]

EtteStarz wrote...

Oh, that comment (Tasmen's) was just begging for a lewd reply...just a pefect set-up but I'll refrain. 

Oh honey, don't hold back on my account   Please don't hold back!

[Shadow of Light Dragon]

Inquiring, sordid minds want to know!

[westiex9]

Lewd comments I love those ones! As long as they don't involve Bears and string that is!

[Tarante11a]

@westiex9 - a little like a vomit-covered, gore-spattered, more romantic Legolas moment from the film of Return of the King, when he slides down the Oliphant's trunk? Yes... I think I like that idea.

@EttaStarz - You can't back out now!

Modifié par Tarante11a, 18 avril 2010 - 03:00 .

[Tarante11a]

Respeck.

[Gilgamesh1138]

Teehee, Ette is chaste? Hmm, I have a bridge to sell you all.

I love the inappropriate romance timing. ROFL!

Modifié par Gilgamesh1138, 18 avril 2010 - 03:11 .

[westiex9]

Is it a Lewd Bridge?

[Shadow of Light Dragon]

Oh dear XD

[Gilgamesh1138]

LOL, *wipes tears of laughter off her face* westie and Ette you are cracking me up.

Modifié par Gilgamesh1138, 18 avril 2010 - 03:21 .

[Tasmen]

EtteStarz wrote...

Hey! 

Okay, okay...>...ahem.

I was just going to reply...

Tasmen: "Their timing can be quite..inappropriate at times, eh?"

Ettestarz:  "Why yes.  Men are always 'comming' (different spelling of course) onto you at the most inappropriate times."

Okay, my reputation is ruined now...off the Chantry I go.

  Heee!

And if you can get your reputation ruined by the chantry for that, I'm really doomed.  My mind works full time in the gutter.

[Tarante11a]

I think it would be pretty unfair considering Bioware have put dialogue into both DA & ME which makes your comment look like a Sunday sermon. Have you heard Sten explaining about what happens during Qunari sex? AND the things Oghren says! And Prof. Solus's 'Do not... ingest'.

On that note....

WILLIES!!!! *runs away*

Modifié par Tarante11a, 18 avril 2010 - 03:36 .

[Gilgamesh1138]

ROFL! Cloaca! *runs away*

[Gilgamesh1138]

ROFLMAO! Okay, so bad sex scenes should include "quivering member."

[Tasmen]

Gilgamesh1138 wrote...

ROFLMAO! Okay, so bad sex scenes should include "quivering member."

I could give you a list of things they should include...  I found a wonderful site FILLED to the brim with wonderful descriptives.  I use this site often when I'm writing my badfic smut pieces like 'Slippery When Wet'.  

The site is here.  It is work safe for pictures but content?  Not so much.

[westiex9]

Maker help me but



A Bad sex scene must have the following



1.Aweful 70's porn dialogue "Hey baby im a good catholic so its time for me to receive ma blessing"



2.Equally aweful 70's music



3.A hairy camera guy filming the whole thing



4. A panel of judges to score the whole thing this weeks being:



Bill clinton,John F kennedy,Mr Rodgers,Prince and Zevran

[Gilgamesh1138]

LOL! Tasmen, bookmarked it. And westiex9, dude you seriously made me almost snort my wine. Oh my the panel of judges.