Rix Raw wrote...
It's called sexual frustration. Men who are not satisfied with their love life (or do not have one) enjoy controlling a female character in games, engaging in heterosexual romance, feeling that they can only do that if they have complete control over the woman participant.
There are countless excuses, for instance that they don't want to look at their male characters during the game, not realising that with that they just prove that they are looking at the game differently, pursuing sexual experiences in it. Don't get me wrong, I'm not judging, none of us are flawless and this isn't such a big deal for a teenager. However, if you're no longer a teenage boy or you're in a relationship, maybe even married and still prefer playing female characters, then you should probably stop and look at this warning sign and think about what's wrong.
On the other hand, playing with a randomly thought up "tough guy" or "pretty boy" can be almost as bad - again, not for a teenager, obviously -, because it means you're not at peace with your looks or who you are.
I'll admit that there are people that are like that, but to say that men who play as femshep (and essentially women who play as maleshep) are all sexually frustrated is wrong. There way too many people who do this to get lumped into one category, society is too complex for that. There are many reasons for someone to play as the opposite gender (and pursue a heterosexual relationship for that character if they choose to do so). In regards to ME, some men find femshep a better fit for the lead role than maleshep. Others prefer femsheps VA to malesheps. There are those like me who play as both genders to experience all the story arcs the game has to offer. I do not get any perverse pleasure playing as a female. The main reason I pursue any of the LI's, male and female, is that they allow me to get to know those squadmates little bit better. I hated the love scenes in ME1, I thought that was pretty lame that BW put those in there (but that's just my opinion, I know there are those who liked them and I got nothing against those guys). The only LI I've done so far in ME2 is Garrus, which I thought was funny and cute (Oops, I said cute. Does that make me gay?

). But I digress. As for the OP, you need to understand that not everyone projects themselves as the main character. Even though I have a Shepard with my first name and tried to make him look like me, I do not think of him as me and what he does isn't always what I would do. That applies to all of my sheps, male and female.
I guess the point I'm trying to make is we all have different reasons for playing the game the way we do. Even if you do not understand another persons reasons, you should at least respect those reasons and not jump to conclusions as to why they play the game like that.