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Garrus Love and Adoration v.2


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#23451
Xsause

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Mr.BlazenGlazen wrote...

Ah, that may be my problem lol. I posted it in my blog, i'm not sure if i should try fanfiction.com, i'd rather not face the criticism.


The people at Fanfiction.Net are quite nice, and when they do give criticism it's usually constructive. You can post it there without having to worry about flamers.

Best review I ever got?

One for Fail for the Lost.

Oh, you know, I think I love you. The things you're doing are so f***ing AWESOME, so INSANE but great...yeah, we're all waiting for a FOURSOME or whatever your spoiled fantasy will give us.



Just don't stop.



I went :lol: IRL when I read that.

Modifié par Xsause, 28 mai 2010 - 11:07 .


#23452
Lemonwizard

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Neria Rose wrote...

I'm afraid I'm with those folks. I find Aria easily the most stunningly gorgeous Asari ever. It might also be that she's in a position of power and seems very dominant *shrugs*.



The Asari councilor is the hottest Asari in the game.

#23453
Nevara

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can someone tell me how to make a linky? (mind ain't functioning this sec)

#23454
Xsause

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Nevara wrote...

can someone tell me how to make a linky? (mind ain't functioning this sec)


[url ] *link* [/url ], without the spaces.

#23455
Nilfalasiel

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Yeah, folks at fanfiction.net seem to mostly comment on your stuff when they have nice things to say, and if they do criticize something, it's usually not "zomfg, you suck!". At least, not from my experience. Then again, I only have 2 fics up there at the mo'. But Xsause seems to have had a similar experience.

In short, just post it!

#23456
Mr.BlazenGlazen

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Maybe, though i would have to do some editing, but i don't feel like it right now.

#23457
Nevara

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alright, i used to be good at this, how do i make it pretty if that makes sense.

#23458
Xsause

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Nevara wrote...

alright, i used to be good at this, how do i make it pretty if that makes sense.


Do you mean posting links like this, with text showing up instead of just the link?

For that, use [url =*link*](text you want to use)[/ url]. (without the spaces, of course.)

Modifié par Xsause, 28 mai 2010 - 11:24 .


#23459
Nevara

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thank you so much :D much love to you!

#23460
Xsause

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Nevara wrote...

thank you so much :D much love to you!


No problem. :)

#23461
battlechantress

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I felt kind of silly sitting around not really contributing anything worthwhile to this thread (even though it's the only one I keep up with due to RL), so I tried creating my first ever attempt at writing a fanfic. Yep, it's got Garrus in it:

Grr, I'm inept:  http://www.fanfictio...d_Night_in_Flux

The odd thing is, I really only intended to write the ridiculous bar scene, but after I typed out the first paragraph, it just... mushroomed.  It's probably closer to "crackfic", but I'm not really sure.  I guess this is what happens when you sit in your car and write what you can on your lunch breaks. :) Hope it doesn't suck too terribly (I won't pretend it's "perfect" by any means; the best I can do is write like a "poor woman's Douglas Adams").

Hope everybody has a good and safe weekend.  Cheers!

:)

Modifié par battlechantress, 28 mai 2010 - 11:35 .


#23462
Nevara

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Well I got my first five Chapters out so... if anyone wants to check it out, by all means do so. I look forward to someone saying something constructive...

#23463
Andaius20

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to add on the discussion a few pages back. Did they say, that Asari don't have a organized military persay? each City raises an army and fights independently. So they are totally reliant on the commando's as they would get crushed in a frontline conflict.

#23464
Twilight_Princess

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Neria Rose wrote...

Collider wrote...

janeym27 wrote...

Collider wrote...

I think the Asari as a race was wasted potential.


Do elaborate, Collider. :)

My main problem with the Asari as a race is that they are very Mary Sue. All of the other races have problems that serve to balance them out.

The Turians have an impressive and experienced military. They have a wealth of soldiers at their command due to their belief of serving the state. However, they are not particularly good at business and they lack the same type of artistic drive that some other races have. They tend to be more severe in their military actions, sometimes to a fault. They live roughly the same as humans, which point at a disadvantage to Krogan and Asari.

The Salarians have an extensive spy and special forces network that puts any other to shame. They are typically quick thinking and enjoy learning new things. However, they are a short lived species and aside from their intelligence gathering, their military isn't very good. They are also known to be deceitful and always having ulterior motives. They never let another person have the full story.

Volus are excellent at business, however they are defenseless in combat. Unless you're the Biotic God, that is.

Etc.

The Asari? As it is, most peaceful, most wise, most advanced, most long lived,
most desired, most sexual, most powerful, most people, most territory,
most artistic, best biotics, best soldiers, best economy, best & most everything is boring.
It sounds like something out of bad fanfiction, like space elves. I also find the sexual aspects of Asari culture to be suspect. They can have make sex with anyone and typically have a more "free" view of sexuality. Makes me think that someone in Bioware went "you know...we need alien space babes."


Thankfully, there are plenty of Asari characters who are interesting and more balanced. However, from a lore stand point, I felt like they could have done a lot better with the Asari as a race. They need faults. Faults are part of what can make a race interesting. As it is, their greatest fault is like there's a very very small chance that Asari-Asari parents can make Ardat-Yakshi. That's basically it.


Turians are my favourite SciFi race, and I feel that we know very little about them still.

Agreed. Turian culture seems interesting, what with their emphasis on serving the state. I want to see how their culture and society is. That's part of the reason I want to go to Palaven.


Very well stated. I'm not anti-Asari (anti-Liara, for sure, but not anti-Asari), but I definitely think there could be some improvements with them as a race. I loved seeing more matriarchs in ME2. I also loved seeing a greater variety of Asari who were not using their sexuality (Consort and her acolytes, etc.) nor mentioning how barely legal and virginal they are *gag*.

Okay, I'm going to stop now.







That's exactly my problem with them also. I don't have fanboy goggles, the stripping and sexualisation does not work on me I'm afraid so I notice the mary sueness.


There has to be faults, you are absolutely correct. It's no wonder why every single male alien ever in mass effect 2 does not have a mate of their own species, the asari are perfect! Why would you bother? I mean why would krogans,salerians, turians, volus, elcor , every species in the universe, go for something that wasn't sexually appealing to a human being? Makes no sense! Hawt humanoid blue women with boobies must be attractive to every single species because its FAR too silly to contemplate that attractiveness, for other aliens, can be varied and completely different to how humans perceive it. Why, if they even suggest that aliens might want to go for something that wasn't hawt and humanoid , well, the world would end! Fanboys would cry into their controllers, the internet forums would FLOOD with angry and poorly spelled complaints, female aliens that aren’t hawt?? THE OUTRAGE. 

I have to stop there, I can't get any more sarcastic Posted Image that's why I found the asari cop the MOST refreshing one out of every asari I've met in the game, she wasn't sexualized , she wasn't put there to titillate anyone and was just doing her job.

#23465
Andaius20

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Also talking with the bar tender in Eternity, and Aria, the Asari aren't as "wise" or "advanced" as the would want you to believe. Take a look at the Humans, came from vitually no space flight then they beat off the Turians, and Saved the Citidel races from the Geth and Soverign.



Most of the Asari traits seem to just be the image they want you to think them having and not what really is.

#23466
Bugsie

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Xsause wrote...

One for Fail for the Lost.


You wrote that Xsause?? I found that independently of the Bioware boards and loved it!Posted Image

Fanfiction.net is a great place for obsessives such as myself.... warm hugs all round.

#23467
Collider

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Andaius20 wrote...

Also talking with the bar tender in Eternity, and Aria, the Asari aren't as "wise" or "advanced" as the would want you to believe. Take a look at the Humans, came from vitually no space flight then they beat off the Turians, and Saved the Citidel races from the Geth and Soverign.

Most of the Asari traits seem to just be the image they want you to think them having and not what really is.

I think the thing is that in the codex they are implied as being the most wise and certainly the most advanced.

#23468
Andaius20

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Well they might have been the "most advanced" but it seems that they are rapidly falling behind or the gap is getting shorter very quickly. To me they seem to be complacent now, not bothering to advance as quickly as the other shorter lived races. There long lives make them tend to sit back and not really take action.

#23469
Bugsie

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I never really had a problem with the Asari being potrayed the way they are - it seemed logical to me that the most advanced race the ones who rediscovered the Citadel would be presented this way. Personally, I hate the term "Mary Sue" mainly for the mere fact that it is often used in dismissive terms rather than as a complete criticism (and often used in a misogynistic way leveled at female writers).

#23470
Xsause

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Buggirl70 wrote...

Xsause wrote...

One for Fail for the Lost.


You wrote that Xsause?? I found that independently of the Bioware boards and loved it!Posted Image

Fanfiction.net is a great place for obsessives such as myself.... warm hugs all round.


Yep, and I'm still busy writing Chapter 12. Jack still has to be recruited, Grunt has yet to be born, and the epicness that is the FemShepxSarenxMordinxGarrus pairing will also get a chapter all for itself.

Of course, none of it will be taken seriously. ^_^

#23471
Collider

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Buggirl70 wrote...
I never really had a problem with the Asari being potrayed the way they are - it seemed logical to me that the most advanced race the ones who rediscovered the Citadel would be presented this way.

The things is, they don't need to couple so many "mosts" and "bests" with each other. They could easily have had the Asari as less advanced than the Turians or Salarians but they still found the Citadel first. The Asari could have cultural and political problems that made their economy weak. The Asari didn't have to be able to mind read or mind control, they didn't have to be able to have sex with anyone. But they do - they are bascially flawless as a race - the only thing is that like 3 people of their population are vampires. Lol

Personally, I hate the term "Mary Sue" mainly for the mere fact that it is often used in dismissive terms rather than as a complete criticism (and often used in a misogynistic way leveled at female writers).

Mary Sue is basically another way of saying that the character is too perfect and needs to have flaws to be more interesting. This has nothing to do with gender, Mary Sue is basically a universal term for perfect, dull characters. If the Asari were male I'd be calling them Marty Stus.

#23472
Mr.BlazenGlazen

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uh, guys, i don't mind the asari convo but Woo or Priestly might. Lets go back to talking about turians and garrus.

#23473
Cerrydd

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Mr.BlazenGlazen wrote...

uh, guys, i don't mind the asari convo but Woo or Priestly might. Lets go back to talking about turians and garrus.


Yeah, we really should get back on topic. Priestly scared the crap out of me.

#23474
Andaius20

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Right you are! Moar Garrus!

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#23475
Bugsie

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Ha yes vampires!

I think the term "Marty Stus" is relatively new, initially the terms was levelled at amateur writers mostly females trying to write good female characters, particularly in Science Fiction, if you read early Science Fiction, there are very few female characters that are heroic in any sense, so the term was definitely originally aimed at criticising how women wrote when they started writing more in this genre. Although you are right too - the term is more universal now - refering to both genders, I still don't think it consitutes a good literary criticism, lots of characters have been labelled Mary Sue's yet the character is reasonably well drawn, they might be perfect in too many ways but many are still fully fledged characters. Wish I had some examples to quote!  I've also heard Garrus being  labelled as a "Garrus Sue", but that just isnt right, he is awesome but he also has plenty of flaws.

I forgot I said yesterday I was going to post some Warhol like Garrus shots, have started but not happy with the outcome yet - will post here shortly.  Off to the art shop for some supplies.

Modifié par Buggirl70, 29 mai 2010 - 12:26 .