279 réponses à ce sujet

[OptimusAlex]

Borschtbeet wrote...

Tali was such a clutz.  The way she kept on blabbing and talking about how nervous she was and then elaborating about how it's a defense mechanism was just grating.
What in the Hell is wrong with her?  She was talking about how she wanted to feel her skin against mine(popped a chode there I'll admit) and then she's like
"duhhh...I'm going to blab like an idiot" once she's in my cabin. 

Then once Tali shuts her stupid piehole we see about 1/2 second of physical contact...the end.

For those who have yet to scrog any of the female players.  Scrog Jack or Miranda.  Forget Tali.  The novelty isn't worth it.

why are you always such a douche

[77boy84]

Remaix wrote...

Borschtbeet wrote...

Raphael diSanto wrote...

Borschtbeet wrote...

Who I scrog in real life is nobody's business but I can tell you that I would never scrog anyone who told me acting like an idiot is a natural defense mechanism.

Why would Tali talk about a defense mechanism before a scrog? Defense from what? It's not like Shepard was raping her.

You do understand that Tali's not talking about defending herself physically, right?

Are you 15 years old, or you do you simply have the social skills of a dead goldfish? I'm guessing you've not experienced or not paid attention to social dynamics between two people who like each other?

What the Hell was her annoying babbling defending her from then?  It's not like never shutting up would make Shepard's youghurt any less toxic.

There are no words for the amount of fail. THERE ARE NO WORDS.

We're posting on a forum where the daily topics are "Tali is so great!" and "How do cross species alien sex work?"

Lets not talk about fail here.

[Borschtbeet]

SkywardDescent wrote...

Borschtbeet wrote...

Raphael diSanto wrote...

Borschtbeet wrote...

Who I scrog in real life is nobody's business but I can tell you that I would never scrog anyone who told me acting like an idiot is a natural defense mechanism.

Why would Tali talk about a defense mechanism before a scrog? Defense from what? It's not like Shepard was raping her.

You do understand that Tali's not talking about defending herself physically, right?

Are you 15 years old, or you do you simply have the social skills of a dead goldfish? I'm guessing you've not experienced or not paid attention to social dynamics between two people who like each other?

What the Hell was her annoying babbling defending her from then?  It's not like never shutting up would make Shepard's youghurt any less toxic.

I think you're thinking of "defense mechanism" as a means to protect her from getting punched in the face.

She means a social defense mechanism. She likes Shepard, so she is naturally nervous, and some people (like some people I know) talk a lot when they get nervous. Tali is one of those people.

There is nothing wrong with talking before a scrog.  Lots of people do it but you're suppose to talk about something sexy.  Tali talking about being an idiot didn't make me stand at attention.

[Litos456]

Borschtbeet wrote...

Litos456 wrote...

Borschtbeet wrote...

Litos456 wrote...

@OP:
I'm sorry sir but your reasoning is completely off. That is Tali's character. It's the way she is. Some people may not like Miranda for her cocky attitude for example.
A lot of people love Tali for what she is, and that's that. You posting this thread is only flooding up the forums.
Tali rocks.

Miranda wasn't cocky, she was confident.  She, like Tali wanted Shepard's ass.  While Tali babbled incoherently about "natural defense mechanisms"(great bedroom talk there Tali you clutz), Miranda just took it.

Thats why I like Miranda, she wanted to scrog, so we scrogged.  No complications.

Only strange thing about Miranda is why in the Hell did she want to scrog in the engine room?  What is wrong with the bed?  Wouldn't the hard metal floor be a bit uncomfortable?

Tali didn't want Shepard for his ass, she wanted to be with him for himself. As in, not necessarily sex, but a relationship. The only reason she was looking towards sex - and we don't even know if they actually HAD sex, they may have just rubbed against each other a bit - was because she wanted their relationship to be real not outside the suit type of relationship, and also because they're about to go and die, or at least that's what it seemed like at the time.

That separates her from Miranda greatly, and the reason she was babbling was because she was shy in front of Shepard because she actually loved him and she's the kind of person who's a little more nervous about what they make themselves look like in front of someone they're in love with.

You must've missed the part when she said "I want to feel your skin against mine".

It's clear she wanted to scrog him.  What do you think she did?  Got naked and just gave him a Dutch scrog?  Not likely.  Of course I wouldn't be surprised if Shepard just got tired of how damn annoying Tali was and just kicked her out and read Fornax instead.
That is what I would've done.

She didn't mean it in the way that she wanted to have sex with him. She doesn't NEED to have sex with him in order to feel his skin. You can't make assumptions like that. It's possible, but it might have never happened. Feeling her skin against Shepard is not feeling Shepard's unit in hers. Also, she describes how most Quarian-interspecies relationships aren't "real" and take place outside the suit. She didn't like that because it basically renders a relationship bare. By taking off her helmet/suit with Shepard it shows how she truly loves him she's ready to do that for him.

Sex is possible, but again it might not have happened. If it did, why are you so annoyed by how she's babbling? Most people, including myself, find it cute, not annoying. Besides, after 30 seconds she jumped on Shepard like the horniest Quarian in the galaxy.

[drunken pyromaniac]

Borschtbeet wrote...

S3RV0 wrote...

Borschtbeet wrote...

S3RV0 wrote...

I think the real question is why would you even want to scrog an aardvark faced, virgin with chicken feet when you could bang Miranda and her smokin body or Jack and her beautiful face... although renegade Jack only, the crying is a real boner killer.

Because I always had a soft spot for the ugly chick.  Everyone needs a pity scrog now and then.  I felt like I was doing a public service scrogging Tali.

It wasn't worth it though.  Tali's incessant ramblings about how she got prepared, she's nervous blah blah blah was awful.

hahahahaa touche.

I guess I can't argue with that logic. I assume you like to go "hoggin" every now a then and throw the fat chicks a bone as well?

I can see it now... ME3, Borschtbeet scrogs the first introduced female Volus.

Also in ME3, a Hanar scrogs emo Jack and hentai fans of the world rejoice.

Yeah, people like me are useful.  I'm like that buddy you had back in college who you'd go up to and say

"hey dude, this fat girl wants to scrog me, I don't want to but I don't want to hurt her feelings."

and I would be like

"Don't worry dude, I'll handle it."

I scrog ugly women so you don't have to.

Such a gentleman. *sarcasm*

Modifié par drunken pyromaniac, 20 février 2010 - 10:02 .

[OptimusAlex]

BobbyTheI wrote...

Scrog on the stairs
Alone or in pairs
Have fun with the neighbor's dog

With Tali or Jack
Flat down on their back
It's Scrog, Scrog, Scrog

It's Scrog, Scrog
It's big
It's heavy
His wood

It's Scrog, Scrog
When you're being bad, it's good!

Everyone wants a Scrog
You're gonna love it, Scrog
Come on and go get Scrogged
Everyone needs a Scrog
Scrog Scrog Scrog Scrog

Excellent! ren and stimpy ftw

[Digifi]

Borschtbeet wrote...

SkywardDescent wrote...

Borschtbeet wrote...

Raphael diSanto wrote...

Borschtbeet wrote...

Who I scrog in real life is nobody's business but I can tell you that I would never scrog anyone who told me acting like an idiot is a natural defense mechanism.

Why would Tali talk about a defense mechanism before a scrog? Defense from what? It's not like Shepard was raping her.

You do understand that Tali's not talking about defending herself physically, right?

Are you 15 years old, or you do you simply have the social skills of a dead goldfish? I'm guessing you've not experienced or not paid attention to social dynamics between two people who like each other?

What the Hell was her annoying babbling defending her from then?  It's not like never shutting up would make Shepard's youghurt any less toxic.

I think you're thinking of "defense mechanism" as a means to protect her from getting punched in the face.

She means a social defense mechanism. She likes Shepard, so she is naturally nervous, and some people (like some people I know) talk a lot when they get nervous. Tali is one of those people.

There is nothing wrong with talking before a scrog.  Lots of people do it but you're suppose to talk about something sexy.  Tali talking about being an idiot didn't make me stand at attention.

In other words, since you didn't feel like it was a good lead up to them about to "scrog" you were then not able to "flog"?  I suppose a little blue balls makes people react in the manner you have, no worries.

[SkywardDescent]

Borschtbeet wrote...

SkywardDescent wrote...

Borschtbeet wrote...

Raphael diSanto wrote...

Borschtbeet wrote...

Who I scrog in real life is nobody's business but I can tell you that I would never scrog anyone who told me acting like an idiot is a natural defense mechanism.

Why would Tali talk about a defense mechanism before a scrog? Defense from what? It's not like Shepard was raping her.

You do understand that Tali's not talking about defending herself physically, right?

Are you 15 years old, or you do you simply have the social skills of a dead goldfish? I'm guessing you've not experienced or not paid attention to social dynamics between two people who like each other?

What the Hell was her annoying babbling defending her from then?  It's not like never shutting up would make Shepard's youghurt any less toxic.

I think you're thinking of "defense mechanism" as a means to protect her from getting punched in the face.

She means a social defense mechanism. She likes Shepard, so she is naturally nervous, and some people (like some people I know) talk a lot when they get nervous. Tali is one of those people.

There is nothing wrong with talking before a scrog.  Lots of people do it but you're suppose to talk about something sexy.  Tali talking about being an idiot didn't make me stand at attention.

When you're debilitatingly nervous you don't always say the most smooth things.

Modifié par SkywardDescent, 20 février 2010 - 10:08 .

[Madecologist]

drunken pyromaniac wrote...

Borschtbeet wrote...

S3RV0 wrote...

Borschtbeet wrote...

S3RV0 wrote...

I think the real question is why would you even want to scrog an aardvark faced, virgin with chicken feet when you could bang Miranda and her smokin body or Jack and her beautiful face... although renegade Jack only, the crying is a real boner killer.

Because I always had a soft spot for the ugly chick.  Everyone needs a pity scrog now and then.  I felt like I was doing a public service scrogging Tali.

It wasn't worth it though.  Tali's incessant ramblings about how she got prepared, she's nervous blah blah blah was awful.

hahahahaa touche.

I guess I can't argue with that logic. I assume you like to go "hoggin" every now a then and throw the fat chicks a bone as well?

I can see it now... ME3, Borschtbeet scrogs the first introduced female Volus.

Also in ME3, a Hanar scrogs emo Jack and hentai fans of the world rejoice.

Yeah, people like me are useful.  I'm like that buddy you had back in college who you'd go up to and say

"hey dude, this fat girl wants to scrog me, I don't want to but I don't want to hurt her feelings."

and I would be like

"Don't worry dude, I'll handle it."

I scrog ugly women so you don't have to.

Such a gentleman. *sarcasm*

Why did his response remind me of that scene in Family Guy when Quagmire suggests to Peter to **** himself out to 'fat chicks'?

Modifié par Madecologist, 20 février 2010 - 10:05 .

[Borschtbeet]

Litos456 wrote...

Borschtbeet wrote...

Litos456 wrote...

Borschtbeet wrote...

Litos456 wrote...

@OP:
I'm sorry sir but your reasoning is completely off. That is Tali's character. It's the way she is. Some people may not like Miranda for her cocky attitude for example.
A lot of people love Tali for what she is, and that's that. You posting this thread is only flooding up the forums.
Tali rocks.

Miranda wasn't cocky, she was confident.  She, like Tali wanted Shepard's ass.  While Tali babbled incoherently about "natural defense mechanisms"(great bedroom talk there Tali you clutz), Miranda just took it.

Thats why I like Miranda, she wanted to scrog, so we scrogged.  No complications.

Only strange thing about Miranda is why in the Hell did she want to scrog in the engine room?  What is wrong with the bed?  Wouldn't the hard metal floor be a bit uncomfortable?

Tali didn't want Shepard for his ass, she wanted to be with him for himself. As in, not necessarily sex, but a relationship. The only reason she was looking towards sex - and we don't even know if they actually HAD sex, they may have just rubbed against each other a bit - was because she wanted their relationship to be real not outside the suit type of relationship, and also because they're about to go and die, or at least that's what it seemed like at the time.

That separates her from Miranda greatly, and the reason she was babbling was because she was shy in front of Shepard because she actually loved him and she's the kind of person who's a little more nervous about what they make themselves look like in front of someone they're in love with.

You must've missed the part when she said "I want to feel your skin against mine".

It's clear she wanted to scrog him.  What do you think she did?  Got naked and just gave him a Dutch scrog?  Not likely.  Of course I wouldn't be surprised if Shepard just got tired of how damn annoying Tali was and just kicked her out and read Fornax instead.
That is what I would've done.

She didn't mean it in the way that she wanted to have sex with him. She doesn't NEED to have sex with him in order to feel his skin. You can't make assumptions like that. It's possible, but it might have never happened. Feeling her skin against Shepard is not feeling Shepard's unit in hers. Also, she describes how most Quarian-interspecies relationships aren't "real" and take place outside the suit. She didn't like that because it basically renders a relationship bare. By taking off her helmet/suit with Shepard it shows how she truly loves him she's ready to do that for him.

Sex is possible, but again it might not have happened. If it did, why are you so annoyed by how she's babbling? Most people, including myself, find it cute, not annoying. Besides, after 30 seconds she jumped on Shepard like the horniest Quarian in the galaxy.

Well if sex didn't happen that pretty much would render the whole purpose of the relationship obsolete now wouldn't it?  Tali may get her jollies off by feeling my skin and sounding stupid constantly but my Shepard is a flesh and blood man with needs.  If Tali can't learn to satiate me, then she's worthless.  Give me Jack or Miranda any day of the week.

[BobbyTheI]

I'm still wrapping my head around "Dutch scrog."

The longer this thread goes on, the more I'm  reminded of this guy and his bizarre habit of making up his own words for stuff.

Any references to "china" or "pickles" come up, and I'm going to get scared.

[Borschtbeet]

If I described what a dutch scrog is, I would get banned.

[Llandaryn]

Borschtbeet wrote...

Tali talking about being an idiot didn't make me stand at attention.

It's a game. It's not supposed to be arousing. That's what porn's for.

[badrobot2]

Borschtbeet wrote...


Well if sex didn't happen that pretty much would render the whole purpose of the relationship obsolete now wouldn't it?  Tali may get her jollies off by feeling my skin and sounding stupid constantly but my Shepard is a flesh and blood man with needs.  If Tali can't learn to satiate me, then she's worthless.  Give me Jack or Miranda any day of the week.

So… you want a sex slave?… interesting.

[drunken pyromaniac]

Madecologist wrote...

Why did his response remind me of that scene in Family Guy when Quagmire suggests to Peter to **** himself out to 'fat chicks'?

 Cause it makes him sound like a sex offender in the making.

[Pannamaslo]

Borschtbeet wrote...

(..) I would get banned.

Yes please.

[Borschtbeet]

Llandaryn wrote...

Borschtbeet wrote...

Tali talking about being an idiot didn't make me stand at attention.

It's a game. It's not supposed to be arousing. That's what porn's for.

Speak for yourself.  I think subtlety in eroticism can be very effective if you have a vivid imagination.  But you have to have something to work with.  Tali is just annoying and stupid, I can't imagine her any other way because of how much of a clutz she came across as during the scrog scene.

[drunken pyromaniac]

How the hell has this gotten to 7 pages?

Is there something wrong with us?

[Llandaryn]

Borschtbeet wrote...

Tali is just annoying and stupid, I can't imagine her any other way because of how much of a clutz she came across as during the scrog scene.

Whereas Miranda and Jack's sex scenes had you making a tent out of your pants?

I think you're missing the whole point of the game.

drunken pyromaniac wrote...

Is there something wrong with us?

Clearly.

/me departs for pastures greener.

Modifié par Llandaryn, 20 février 2010 - 10:11 .

[SkywardDescent]

drunken pyromaniac wrote...

How the hell has this gotten to 7 pages?
Is there something wrong with us?

Quite possibly.

More likely, there is something wrong with Borsch, and we're just giving him crap.

Modifié par SkywardDescent, 20 février 2010 - 10:11 .

[Mokthr]

drunken pyromaniac wrote...

How the hell has this gotten to 7 pages?
Is there something wrong with us?

no everyone is just bored. feeding trolls makes the time go by quickly.

[Litos456]

Borschtbeet wrote...

Litos456 wrote...

Borschtbeet wrote...

Litos456 wrote...

Borschtbeet wrote...

Litos456 wrote...

@OP:
I'm sorry sir but your reasoning is completely off. That is Tali's character. It's the way she is. Some people may not like Miranda for her cocky attitude for example.
A lot of people love Tali for what she is, and that's that. You posting this thread is only flooding up the forums.
Tali rocks.

Miranda wasn't cocky, she was confident.  She, like Tali wanted Shepard's ass.  While Tali babbled incoherently about "natural defense mechanisms"(great bedroom talk there Tali you clutz), Miranda just took it.

Thats why I like Miranda, she wanted to scrog, so we scrogged.  No complications.

Only strange thing about Miranda is why in the Hell did she want to scrog in the engine room?  What is wrong with the bed?  Wouldn't the hard metal floor be a bit uncomfortable?

Tali didn't want Shepard for his ass, she wanted to be with him for himself. As in, not necessarily sex, but a relationship. The only reason she was looking towards sex - and we don't even know if they actually HAD sex, they may have just rubbed against each other a bit - was because she wanted their relationship to be real not outside the suit type of relationship, and also because they're about to go and die, or at least that's what it seemed like at the time.

That separates her from Miranda greatly, and the reason she was babbling was because she was shy in front of Shepard because she actually loved him and she's the kind of person who's a little more nervous about what they make themselves look like in front of someone they're in love with.

You must've missed the part when she said "I want to feel your skin against mine".

It's clear she wanted to scrog him.  What do you think she did?  Got naked and just gave him a Dutch scrog?  Not likely.  Of course I wouldn't be surprised if Shepard just got tired of how damn annoying Tali was and just kicked her out and read Fornax instead.
That is what I would've done.

She didn't mean it in the way that she wanted to have sex with him. She doesn't NEED to have sex with him in order to feel his skin. You can't make assumptions like that. It's possible, but it might have never happened. Feeling her skin against Shepard is not feeling Shepard's unit in hers. Also, she describes how most Quarian-interspecies relationships aren't "real" and take place outside the suit. She didn't like that because it basically renders a relationship bare. By taking off her helmet/suit with Shepard it shows how she truly loves him she's ready to do that for him.

Sex is possible, but again it might not have happened. If it did, why are you so annoyed by how she's babbling? Most people, including myself, find it cute, not annoying. Besides, after 30 seconds she jumped on Shepard like the horniest Quarian in the galaxy.

Well if sex didn't happen that pretty much would render the whole purpose of the relationship obsolete now wouldn't it?  Tali may get her jollies off by feeling my skin and sounding stupid constantly but my Shepard is a flesh and blood man with needs.  If Tali can't learn to satiate me, then she's worthless.  Give me Jack or Miranda any day of the week.

Are you stupid? Sex is not part of a relationship, you can have a relationship without sex.
This clearly tells everyone what kind of person you are in real life in terms of those things, although that's not our business.

Also, since you're so concerned by what she means by "defence mechanism", the "mechanism" is defending her against her own fear of embarrasing herself in front of Shepard. The "mechanism", however, which is what she calls it, in term makes her feel like she's embarrasing herself even more. Shepard doesn't mind and knows that she's just worried, and all it takes is for him to take off her helmet and then she's ok.

Is it really that hard to comprehend?

[mjwoltsknar]

she's coo'

[Borschtbeet]

badrobot2 wrote...

Borschtbeet wrote...


Well if sex didn't happen that pretty much would render the whole purpose of the relationship obsolete now wouldn't it?  Tali may get her jollies off by feeling my skin and sounding stupid constantly but my Shepard is a flesh and blood man with needs.  If Tali can't learn to satiate me, then she's worthless.  Give me Jack or Miranda any day of the week.

So… you want a sex slave?… interesting.

Interesting interpretation.  No.  I think satiety should go both ways.  Tali can't deliver so she's worthless.

[Borschtbeet]

Litos456 wrote...

Borschtbeet wrote...

Litos456 wrote...

Borschtbeet wrote...

Litos456 wrote...

Borschtbeet wrote...

Litos456 wrote...

@OP:
I'm sorry sir but your reasoning is completely off. That is Tali's character. It's the way she is. Some people may not like Miranda for her cocky attitude for example.
A lot of people love Tali for what she is, and that's that. You posting this thread is only flooding up the forums.
Tali rocks.

Miranda wasn't cocky, she was confident.  She, like Tali wanted Shepard's ass.  While Tali babbled incoherently about "natural defense mechanisms"(great bedroom talk there Tali you clutz), Miranda just took it.

Thats why I like Miranda, she wanted to scrog, so we scrogged.  No complications.

Only strange thing about Miranda is why in the Hell did she want to scrog in the engine room?  What is wrong with the bed?  Wouldn't the hard metal floor be a bit uncomfortable?

Tali didn't want Shepard for his ass, she wanted to be with him for himself. As in, not necessarily sex, but a relationship. The only reason she was looking towards sex - and we don't even know if they actually HAD sex, they may have just rubbed against each other a bit - was because she wanted their relationship to be real not outside the suit type of relationship, and also because they're about to go and die, or at least that's what it seemed like at the time.

That separates her from Miranda greatly, and the reason she was babbling was because she was shy in front of Shepard because she actually loved him and she's the kind of person who's a little more nervous about what they make themselves look like in front of someone they're in love with.

You must've missed the part when she said "I want to feel your skin against mine".

It's clear she wanted to scrog him.  What do you think she did?  Got naked and just gave him a Dutch scrog?  Not likely.  Of course I wouldn't be surprised if Shepard just got tired of how damn annoying Tali was and just kicked her out and read Fornax instead.
That is what I would've done.

She didn't mean it in the way that she wanted to have sex with him. She doesn't NEED to have sex with him in order to feel his skin. You can't make assumptions like that. It's possible, but it might have never happened. Feeling her skin against Shepard is not feeling Shepard's unit in hers. Also, she describes how most Quarian-interspecies relationships aren't "real" and take place outside the suit. She didn't like that because it basically renders a relationship bare. By taking off her helmet/suit with Shepard it shows how she truly loves him she's ready to do that for him.

Sex is possible, but again it might not have happened. If it did, why are you so annoyed by how she's babbling? Most people, including myself, find it cute, not annoying. Besides, after 30 seconds she jumped on Shepard like the horniest Quarian in the galaxy.

Well if sex didn't happen that pretty much would render the whole purpose of the relationship obsolete now wouldn't it?  Tali may get her jollies off by feeling my skin and sounding stupid constantly but my Shepard is a flesh and blood man with needs.  If Tali can't learn to satiate me, then she's worthless.  Give me Jack or Miranda any day of the week.

Are you stupid? Sex is not part of a relationship, you can have a relationship without sex.
This clearly tells everyone what kind of person you are in real life in terms of those things, although that's not our business.

Also, since you're so concerned by what she means by "defence mechanism", the "mechanism" is defending her against her own fear of embarrasing herself in front of Shepard. The "mechanism", however, which is what she calls it, in term makes her feel like she's embarrasing herself even more. Shepard doesn't mind and knows that she's just worried, and all it takes is for him to take off her helmet and then she's ok.

Is it really that hard to comprehend?

Oh so she was defending herself in fear of looking like a clutz?  I'd say she failed pretty badly.  She not only failed but she also totally destroyed the mood which was being built up and turned the scene into a total let down.