Ce sujet est fermé
I was deeply upset so I decided to do something about it.
I decided to write the sequel myself for as Elcor Shakespeare once said:
"Profoundly: The show must go on."
Because I still have to upgrade the computer, I still haven't actualy played the game unfortunately. However, I have been watching a very good let's play of it and using it and other sources will be following the story.
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Prologue[/b]
[/b]
INT: A STRANGE PLACE.
PROBABLY CAMELOT. [/b]
[/b]
We stare directly into the corona of a dying star, a red
giant. You look at the box wondering if you got the wrong game. The camera cuts
slightly back, better but the damage has been done. We are now blind.
Another cut. We are in black void of some sort with the sun
in the center. A woman in a white jumpsuit is staring at the sun. “What is this
Myst?!” you wonder. Further back a man sits wearing an expensive suit on an
expensive chair. Vertical, sheet like and circular yellow holograms float
around the room.
The woman in the white jump suit, identified as Miranda
Lawson begins to speak. She sounds like Sarah Walker from the hit TV show
Chuck. You look at the ugly box art again. You wonder if you got Chuck: The
Game instead.
MIRANDA:[/b] The
Shepard Siblings did everything right. Mostly Jane though, John was just a
troublemaker. Saving the Citadel - even the Council. Humanity is now stronger
than ever
The camera gets bored and decides to get a closer look at
Miranda’s finely sculpted buttocks.
MIRANDA: [/b]<turns.
It is Sarah!> Hey! Stop being a pervert camera man!
We cut further back until we see an old decrepit hand with a
cigarette in it working on a holographic console. It is accompanied by the
soothing voice of the President from the TV series “West Wing”
ILLUSIVE MAN: [/b]Our
sacrifices have heard America’s…
I mean the Council’s gratitude but the Shepard’s remain our best hope. Not
because they have special powers or anything. I just like them
MIRANDA: [/b]But they
are sending Jane to fight Geth! She takes John just to keep him out of trouble.
Miranda walks towards the Illusive Man. She passes through a
hologram and a million terabytes scream in agony.
MIRANDA:[/b] We both know the Geth are not the real threat.
The government wants the Intersect… ARGH! SORRY! … I mean the Reapers are still
out there.
Author waves hand at you. You will laugh heartily at the
silly references to other shows whose actors just happen to be voices
here.
ILLUSIVE MAN: [/b]And
it’s up to us to stop them. A pro-human shady terrorist organization. It’s like
Osama fighting the Combine or something. It’s weird! <He takes a drag on his
cigarette>
MIRANDA: [/b]The
Council will never trust Cerberus. They’ll never accept our help. Even after
everything humanity has accomplished. As if they want to avoid associating
themselves with terrorists
But the Shepard Siblings… the Council will follow them, well
Jane at least. They’re BIG GODDAMN HEROES... But they are just two people, if
we lose them, humanity might well follow, unless Bioware pulls a Raiden from
MGS2 on us.
Martin Man/Illusive Sheen takes a few more drags on his
cigarette and finally puts it out
ILLUSIVE MAN: [/b]Then
see to it that we don’t lose them … I just realized that it would be horribly
cliché if the Shepard Siblings immediately die after I said that. But I’m sure
Bioware is better than that
[/b]
FADE OUT[/b]
[/b]
EXPOSITION TEXT [/b]
[/b]
One year after the devastation caused by the original Mock
Effect, the Fanfic community struggles to rebuild. Fanboys made tremendous sacrifices in
chastising the author in order to save the story and earned membership into the
Author Mr. Buch blog fan page.
Now the community fearfully awaits the disappointing sequel
as promised. An enormous fanfic that will rot every brain cell and nullify your
appreciation of literature. To quell any
fears the author announced that he will not be writing Mock Effect 2 much to
the rejoicing of the people.
Unfortunately one crazed fan obsessed with the original took
things a bit too far.
[/b]
EXT: SPACE. THE FINAL
FRONTIER [/b]
[/b]
A breathtaking view, the dark side of a beautiful blue
planet, a lonely blue sun, suddenly, a magnificent ship bursts out of nowhere
eclipsing our view. As it passes us by, we see written on the side, “Normandy
SR 1”. As always, we are very impressed.
We cut to the interior.
INT: NORMANDY COMMAND CENTER[/b]
A crewmember writes a report on data pad. He moves away as
the camera moves back through the holographic Galaxy Map. The camera lolls
about and a familiar voice[/b] is heard.
Namely, Seth Green from “Robot Chicken”
JOKER: [/b] Okay we got BLUE SUN and ECLIPSE into the
intro but how can we shoehorn in…
CREWMEMBER: <[/b]Stands
up> Well being a hemophiliac sure is tough.
Time to replace my BLOOD PACK
JOKER: [/b]Nice!
Joker continues to spout techno-babble. Crewmembers do ship
things.
Pressely in particular seems agitated
PRESSLEY: [/b]We are
wasting our time. This is so boring and why are we looking for Geth? Didn’t
Bioware promise us new enemies called the Collectors or something? God! Kill me
now!
GOD: [/b]WISH F***ING
GRANTED!
JOKER: [/b]Three
ships went missing here in the last month. Something happened to them
PRESSLEY: [/b]My
money’s on Slavers, or Cyclons, or Borg or whatever it is you kids are into
nowadays
ENSIGN-FROM-STAR-TREK-2009:
[/b]Picking up something on long range scanners. What Starfleet… I mean the
computer is telling us doesn’t seem possible! Looks like a long
metallic-organic thing
JOKER: [/b]Doesn’t
match any known signatures. Is it Klingon?
EXT: SPACE.[/b]
[/b]
As the Normandy
moves towards the camera we see it is being pursued by
strange alien vessel
INT: NORMANDY[/b]
ENSIGN-FROM-STAR-TREK-2009:
[/b]Cruiser has changed trajectory. It’s on an intercept course
PRESSLEY: [/b]Can’t
be! Stealth systems are engaged. I mean it’s not like we are in visual range or
anything as the cinematic suggested or the Geth of all people would develop a
way to bypass the stealth system.
JOKER: [/b]BRACE
YORUSELVES!! EVASIVE PATTERN DELTA 5! ARM PHOTON TORPEDOES! PREPARE PHASER ARRAY!
EXT: SPACE. [/b]
[/b]
The strange alien vessel begins to charge some sort of
weapon making a terrible screech and the front of the ship glows a blinding
yellow.
[/b]
ALIEN VESSEL: [/b]IMMA
CHARGIN MA LAZOR!!
A thin but powerful beam fires out as the Normandy tries to bravely dodge the incoming
fire. It rocks away but suddenly Joker has an idea
JOKER: [/b]Reverse
Psychology! That’s it! I’ll move TOWARDS the beam to throw them off
The Normandy
does but unfortunately Joker’s plan fails and the beam hits causing a console
to massively explode and fires to break out.
You suddenly realize that Bioware is playing a prank and
just spliced together episodes of Chuck, The West Wing and the opening of Star
Trek 2009 together and packaged it as Mass Effect 2
INT: NORMANDY[/b]
PRESSLY: [/b]<console
explodes> [/b]AAAH!!
ENSIGN-FROM-STAR-TREK-2009:
[/b]PRESSLY! <Her console explodes and she dies>
JOKER: [/b]TECHNOBABBLE!!!
TECHNOBABBLE!! Ensign Ramirez! Get those fires out! <Points behind
himself>
Outside, the ship prepares another volley. A direct hit on
the ship with a thin beam, another blast, the ship begins to burn and fall to
pieces. Inside once more, the entire ship is bathed in a sinister red light.
Fires everywhere, bodies are falling left and right. In between this chaos two
individuals a man and a woman dressed in Pheonix armor run franticly towards
another male/female pair. Kaidan and Ashley stop in front of John and Jane
Shepard standing at a console.
JANE: [/b]John, what
the hell are you doing? WE ARE ABOUT TO DIE!!!
JOHN: [/b]Just give
me a minute; I need to save my game first.
KAIDAN: [/b]Distress
beacon launched as ordered Commander’s.
ASHLEY: [/b]Will the Alliance get here in time?
JOHN: [/b]<Having
saved his game, he turns around> They better! And if they don’t I’m going
to… <Jane gives him “The Look”> … er send a strongly worded letter to
Councilor Anderson lobbying for a change in the Alliance chain of command and regulations.
<He puts on his helmet>
JANE: [/b]The Alliance would never
abandon us. Both of you get the survivors to the shuttles and escape while you
still can. <Puts on helmet>
KAIDAN: [/b]Joker’s still
in the cockpit. He won’t leave the Normandy
JOHN: [/b]<Sheds a
manly tear> My wickle Joker’s all grown up.
He’s become an action hero. I’m so proud
JANE:[/b] WHAT?! Both
you get to the shuttles; John and I are going back for Joker
ASHLEY/KAIDAN: [/b]What?
JOHN: [/b]That’s an
order!! Carth… argh now I’m doing it… I mean Kaidan I really don’t care about
you but Ashley you get that sweet ass of yours onto the shuttle.
Ashley beams at him and replies with a “Yes Sir!” while
Kaidan looks dejected but smiles when Jane blows a kiss at him. As things start
to explode around them, the four split up in opposite directions.
Jane activates the sprinkler system to give Ashley/Kaidan
some time as they being to board people into the escape shuttles. Unfortunately
one person is too late as she is blown across the hall and we get a close up of
her charred face. We feel grossed out.
The long fuselage of the Normandy appears to spit open as we see
server large openings that make them look like broadside cannons on a ship. And
like cannonballs, the escape pods are launched one by one.
As a crippled, burning Normandy limps towards the blue planet we
cut once more to the inside.
John and Jane rush towards the cockpit with John making the
best of the situation and making daring but unnecessary leaps through the
flames. Jane laughs at his antics. He does a really good job of making her feel
at ease during the toughest of times.
They reach the Command
Center whose roof has
been torn of and thus exposing it to open space. They take their time to enjoy
the view, comment on how Dead Space, another EA game did it first and continue
their trudge into the cockpit, environmentally sealed using a special force
field. Joker himself has a force field covering his entire head
JOHN: [/b]Joker my
man! Listen, this is all awesome and stuff but we really need to get out of
where. Wrex already left and I need someone to share my one-liners with!
JOKER: [/b]No I won’t
abandon the Normandy!
I can still save her!!
JANE: [/b]This is no
time for arguments mister. The Alliance
needs pilots like you. You’re too valuable and besides, the CAPTAIN or in this
case COMMANDER’S are supposed to go down with the ship.
JOKER: [/b]…
<Visibly upset> [/b]Fine, let’s
go. But you will have to literally throw me into the pod as quickly as you can.
The airlock is outside the force field and Vaccum = Bad for my health. Oh no!
Outside, the alien vessel charges one final finishing shot.
A massive blast rips open the cockpit; John and Jane franticly pick Joker up
and carry him to the last remaining shuttle but just as they place him in, the
wall behind them blasts open, the depressurization pulls them outward as they
struggle to hold on
JOKER: [/b]COMMANDERS!!!
A final blast pushes them out into open space as Joker’s
shuttle locks and is shot out. The alien vessel fires one more shot that
completely obliterates whatever was left of the Normandy. The two Commander’s float
helplessly screaming in agony and fear as their suits depressurize, ruptures
appear and they begin to suffocate and bleed internally.
JANE: [/b]OMG! OMG!! WE ARE GONNA DIE! WE ARE GONNA
DIE! WE ARE GONNA DIE! IT’S YOUR ENTIRE FAULT! STUPID JOHN!!! <Cries
hysterically>
JOHN: [/b]MY FAULT!
YOU WERE THE ONE WHO SAID! “Commander’s are supposed to go down with the ship”
ARE YOU HAPPY NOW!!! <Screams like a little girl>
JANE: [/b]OH GOD
NO!!! I’M TOO YOUNG TO DIE! I HAD SO MUCH TO DO! NOOOO!!!!
[/b]
JOHN: [/b]OH GOD
NO!!! I’M TOO HANDSOME TO DIE! I HAD SO MANY PEOPLE TO HURT! NOOOO!!!!
JANE: [/b]AAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!!!
[/b]
JOHN: [/b]AAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!!!
And as our soon to be dearly departed Commander’s float
towards the planet we see the morning sun rising and hear a melancholy piano
tune that is supposed to make us cry.
Ladies and Gentlemen
Welcome to the disappointing yet darkly humorous sequel
Welcome To
[/b]
MOCK EFFECT 2[/b]----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
I will eventually improve the formatting since the forum code on the social site sucks. I will continue posting the rest on FANFICTION.NET and giving you heads up or even better if someone who has the game would offer to post it for me
Modifié par InvisiShepard, 01 mars 2010 - 03:56 .
Retour en haut
