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Zaeed Facts: Man, Myth, Mercenary


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#51
Zulu_DFA

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Zulu_DFA wrote...

Zaeed saved Sole Survivor Shepard's arse back on Akuze. Noone ever saw him coming that day. Not even the thresher maws. On that mission he also killed his first ten of Cerberus operatives.


Zaeed also helped War Hero Shepard to save the day on Elysium: when W. H. Shepard was half way through his last thermal clip, Zaeed started his break from prison on the Batarian homeworld.

Modifié par Zulu_DFA, 02 mars 2010 - 06:15 .


#52
Sarevok Anchev

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Question: "What does Zaeed say before having Sex?"

#53
Zulu_DFA

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Sarevok Anchev wrote...

Question: "What does Zaeed say before having Sex?"


"If I must tear you apart [insert name], I will!"

(Yeah, it looks like the Harbinger is a big fan of Zaeed.)

#54
Aisynia

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Sarevok Anchev wrote...

Question: "What does Zaeed say before having Sex?"


I'd like to know. <3

#55
Onyx Jaguar

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Sarevok Anchev wrote...

Question: "What does Zaeed say before having Sex?"


Zaeed is said to say quite a bit, the other person not so much apparently.

#56
Sarevok Anchev

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Aisynia wrote...

Sarevok Anchev wrote...

Question: "What does Zaeed say before having Sex?"


I'd like to know. <3


"It's gotta be easy to get in and a bitc* getting out!" :D

#57
Bron Avery

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Zaeed believes smoking will kill you.

#58
The Uncanny

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Bron Avery wrote...

Zaeed believes smoking will kill you.


Smoking doesn't kill you. Zaeed Massani kills you, then Zaeed Massani smokes.

#59
Zulu_DFA

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tangofish wrote...

Zaeed is a practitioner of feng shui. Any place he inhabits he decorates to bring him good fortune and provide conversation aids when he receives visitors.


And he always puts a target for his knives next to the door. He was actually bored with throwing knives about ten years ago, but old habits grow on you... And it makes other people civilized. "Gentleman begins at knocking at the door", says Zaeed.

#60
vometia

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Onyx Jaguar wrote...

Also am I the only one who thinks that the Character profile that lists Zaeed as 40 completely contradicts the story?

Hmm, I recall something in Dragon Age which places Wynne at around 40, instead of the 60 she looks and acts.  I guess someone at Bioware isn't very good with ages...

Anyway, Zaeed is so badass that it doesn't matter he's so old he remembers Moses.

#61
The Uncanny

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The song Everybody Hurts was is wrong. Zaeed Massani hurts everybody.

#62
JRCHOharry

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Zaeed can interrupt a renegade interrupt.

#63
Zulu_DFA

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JRCHOharry wrote...

Zaeed can interrupt a renegade interrupt.


Zaeed also eats renegade interrupts for breakfast. With milk.

#64
Marilynn-22

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When Shepard is not around Zaeed talks to Jessie

#65
Zulu_DFA

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Marilynn-22 wrote...

When Shepard is not around Zaeed talks to Jessie


When Zaeed has nothing to say, Jessie talks to him.

#66
The Uncanny

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Marilynn-22 wrote...

When Shepard is not around Zaeed talks to Jessie


Trust Zaeed Massani. He knows what he's doing.

#67
Zulu_DFA

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Zaeed met the Shifty-looking Space Cow once. He earned $500.

#68
Zulu_DFA

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Zaeed sold his soul to the Devil once. Next day the Devil came back and demanded a refund. "No way, unless you have a proof of purchase!" Zaeed said. That's how Zaeed made the Devil his Refund Guy. Image IPB

Modifié par Zulu_DFA, 03 mars 2010 - 11:22 .


#69
Zulu_DFA

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Even Biotic God feels a little insecure around Zaeed Massani.

#70
Marilynn-22

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If you stare into Zaeeds eyes long enough, you'll burn.

#71
Zulu_DFA

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Marilynn-22 wrote...

If you stare into Zaeeds eyes long enough, you'll burn.


If he stares back, you'll burn twice as soon. Or just outright explode.

#72
Zulu_DFA

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Zaeed thinks little of a fight with combat drones. To him, it lacks the human element.

#73
Xanthor

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Zaeed doesn't teabag 'em, he potato sacks 'em.

#74
vometia

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Marilynn-22 wrote...

If you stare into Zaeeds eyes long enough, you'll burn.

I think Zaeed's more of a traditionalist: if you stare into his eyes, he'll kick your head in.  And then set fire to you for good measure.

#75
Revenant_Mortalus

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Guns don't kill people, Zaeed kills people.



His business card reads "Zaeed Massani - keeping undertakers in business since 2163"



Zaeed can hit a batarian between both sets of eyes from 1000 yards away with both hands tied behind his back...