989 réponses à ce sujet

[Loki330]

Shepard: Timmah, I got you the collector's base as you asked me to.



TIM: ...Don't want it.

[Ashira Shepard]

binaryemperor wrote...
Harbinger: Ah yes, the "Council" *giant air quote with awesome ship tentacles*. A series of races hidden in the widow nebula; supposedly competent leaders. We have dismissed that claim.

You, dear sir, are made of win.

[Xaijin]

Garrus: Does this armor make my ass look big?



Legion: I am the operator of my pocket calculator.



I'm Commander Shepard, and this the best same-sex brothel in the galaxy.



Harbinger: GIVING YOU CONTROL. ASSUMING THE POSITION.

[jackkel dragon]

*Yet another crossover:*
Sten: I do not understand.
(Female) Shepard: Understand what?
Sten: You are female, yet you lead.
Shepard: So? Salarians only have female leaders, except in the STG.
Sten: ...Really?
Shepard: Yeah.
Sten: Well, then... I will assume... ASSUME DIRECT COMTROL.
Shepard: We already made that joke. More than twenty times.
Sten: Where is my cookie? I was told there would be cookies.

Wrex: Party people!

Udina: I'm here for you, Shepard. *hugs (Female) Shepard close*
Shepard: I know. You're always there for me... *they kiss*
Udina: Shepard... there's something you should know about me.
Shepard: *softly* You can tell me anything, love.
Udina: *hesitates* I am your father.

Modifié par jackkel dragon, 16 mars 2010 - 04:00 .

[Spectre_Shepard]

Shepard: I need to recruit you for my mission. We need to leave right away.



Squadmate: OK, lets go.

[Spectre_Shepard]

AshiraShepard wrote...

binaryemperor wrote...
Harbinger: Ah yes, the "Council" *giant air quote with awesome ship tentacles*. A series of races hidden in the widow nebula; supposedly competent leaders. We have dismissed that claim.

You, dear sir, are made of win.

seconded.

[glitter_guld]

Kelly: I hate him!

[ResidentNoob]

Space Hamster: ASSUMING DIRECT CONTROL!

[JRCHOharry]

EDI (over the Normandy's tannoy system): Shepard, i have discovered that you have searched for explicit content on the extranet last night at 12.59pm, would you like me to delete your history or move it to the 'private' folder?

[Lucifer_Cheney]

Conrad Verner: Now that I think of it, why would my wife pay for me to travel the galaxy without her? It's almost as if she doesn't want me around.

[jackkel dragon]

Lucifer_Cheney wrote...

Conrad Verner: Now that I think of it, why would my wife pay for me to travel the galaxy without her? It's almost as if she doesn't want me around.

Exactly what I was thinking.

Conrad: Why do I waste time opening crates for spare credits? Even I'm tired of having thirty "Avenger IV"s...

(Kid from the Opening of Archangel's mission): You know, maybe I do need some help. Maybe I'll go buy some armor before I run into a sniper nest.
Conrad: Here, take my armor. It's a perfect replica of Commander Shepard's armor. I don't need it, the commander's nothing special.

[Elliotron]

Nickmo: The galaxy's most unscrupulous merchant has been convinced to assist Commander Shepard in a mission to save capitalism throughout the galaxy.

Coming in early December, Quarktu Zekish of the Vol-clan- Laws of Purchasing, will feature a fiscally conservative mission to purchase the last gross of a delicious fruit from an environmentally ravaged planet. Also included is a new weapon: the Liquidator price gun, a market for buying and selling minerals, and an achievement.

[Ashira Shepard]

Vorcha: I've been thinking of plastic surgery ya know?

Krogan: I'm on ur worldz, petting ur bunnehz.

Council: Shepard, the reapers are here!
Shepard: Ah yes, "reapers"...
(simply because there's small chance it won't happen in ME3 *cry*)

Any Collector: Kill the intrud-HURK! ASSUMING DIRECT- NO! **** your "control" - I'm going home!

Jedore: You've all done a fabulous job - three weeks vacation for everyone!

Okeer: Yeah sure, I can start over from scratch, he was just a hobby anyway.

TIM: Shepard; it's time for the truth. I'm actually...you!
Shepard: WTF?! *shoots*
TIM: From the pas-*is shot*
Shepard: Oh shi- *fades from timeline*

[Elliotron]

AshiraShepard wrote...
Jedore: You've all done a fabulous job - three weeks vacation for everyone!

 Too true.  Everytime I play through that mission I expect Jedore to start quoting Lady Deathwhisper from Fall of the Lich King.

[RigAudio]

Kelly: I have never done it with a Varren.

[Oak Tree Leaf]

Karstedt wrote...

Wrex: You hurt my feelings on Virmire, Shepard.

This made me lol

[jackkel dragon]

Salarian STG: If you see us running, try to keep up!

Commander Shepard: If you see me running, it's too late.

[longtimecoming00]

Kaiden: "Maybe I should get a haircut."



Miranda: "My father is a kind and gentle man who is misunderstood by the rest of the galaxy."



Ashley: "You want a piece of me, boy?"

[Ashira Shepard]

Some of these are straight up quotes, others have been inspired/altered to "fit" ->

Morinth: Sex is a dirty, dirty thing and you should only have it with someone you
love very much.


Zaeed: I always get the feeling that when lesbians look at me, they're
thinking, "That's why I'm not a heterosexual."


Shepard: (to the Council) This is gonna sound nuts, but we don't have the time for the whole
the-truth-is-out-there speech, so....

Jacob: Hey, night vision?
Shepard: (puts the digital camera's night vision on for Jacob)
Jacob: (night vision is on and Jacob sees Shepard's face on the
screen)Shepard: Do I look like Paris Hilton?

Warden Kuril: And the south wing? That’s where we house the real hard cases –- the
psychotics, the criminally insane.
Shepard: Sounds cozy.

Legion: Shepard-Commander somehow accomplished copulation with us.
Kelly: Well, why are you talking to me, Legion? Did it "hurt"?
Legion: We have reached consensus. Geth can be traumatized.

Fresh Squadmate: So, your job is to defeat invincible sentient machines?
Shepard: Yep.
FS: Why would anyone want that kind of job?
Shepard: I had a crappy guidance councelor.

Shepard: You're not going to try and kill me are you?
Random NPC: No...
Shepard: Oh, good. Because that would be awkward.

Modifié par AshiraShepard, 17 mars 2010 - 09:32 .

[SlySpy00]

Garrus: I've finally finished those callibrations. Let's talk for a bit.



Thane: I'm going for a swim.



SomeHanarDude: The Protheans didn't make the relays. It was the Reapers you idiots! This one pisses on your graves!



ElcorMan(dancing and singing in a happy manner): IM SO EXCITED! AND I JUST CAN'T HIDE IT! AND I KNOW, I KNOW, I KNOW, I KNOW, I KNOW, I WANT YOU, WANT YOU!



Harbinger(on the set of the new Chipmunks movie): I WILL DIRECT THIS PERSONALLY.



Jacob: I think I'm going to omit the fact that an AI is imbedded in the ship, that way Tali doesn't feel uncomfortable.



Shepard: Shepard.

Wrex: Wrex.



Liara: I understand the weight of the situation with the Reapers, so I will hold off on my Shadow Broker hunt to join your crew.



Udina: Shepard! It's good to see you! I missed you so much.



Uvenk: Yes sir.



TheIllusiveMan: Thanks for blowing up the Collector base. I totally agree with your decision.

Shepard: Where's your cigarette?

TheIllusiveMan: I quit smoking.



Conrad: Geez, Commander Shepard is so overrated. I'm gonna go home to my wife and stop being weird.



Legion: I'm hungry. Wanna get a bite to eat after this Shepard-Commander?



Joker: Bust a move! *Tries to breakdance and winds up breaking his legs*

EDI: Now that's what I call "breakdancing"..........that is a joke.



Turian Councillor: Oh my god, the Reapers are still comming? We need to gather up our defenses immediately!



Advertisement: Binary Helix, so easy a human can do it!

Human: *Listens to music*



Everywhere I go

There's always something to remind me

Of another place in time

[jackkel dragon]

Jack: I just don't know anymore... maybe I need a councilor...
Turian Councilor: Did someone just plead for help? It's SUPERCOUNCILOR to the rescue!
Asari Councilor: What the...
Salarian Councilor: We switched his coffee. Big mistake.
Turian Councilor: Take that you bloody Reapers!

Anderson: The hearing hasn't started yet.
Saren: I accept these accusations.
Anderson: Allow me to retract and correct my statement.
Udina: Shh! We need to find a way to work in the talk about the Reapers.
Salarian Councilor: I'm gay.
*Everyone stares...*

[Kwom Masbag]

AshiraShepard wrote...

Some of these are straight up quotes, others have been inspired/altered to "fit" ->

Morinth: Sex is a dirty, dirty thing and you should only have it with someone you
love very much.


Zaeed: I always get the feeling that when lesbians look at me, they're
thinking, "That's why I'm not a heterosexual."


Shepard: (to the Council) This is gonna sound nuts, but we don't have the time for the whole
the-truth-is-out-there speech, so....

Jacob: Hey, night vision?
Shepard: (puts the digital camera's night vision on for Jacob)
Jacob: (night vision is on and Jacob sees Shepard's face on the
screen)[/b]Shepard: Do I look like Paris Hilton?

Warden Kuril: And the south wing? That’s where we house the real hard cases –- the
psychotics, the criminally insane.
Shepard: Sounds cozy.

Legion: Shepard-Commander somehow accomplished copulation with us.
Kelly: Well, why are you talking to me, Legion? Did it "hurt"?
Legion: We have reached consensus. Geth can be traumatized.

Fresh Squadmate: So, your job is to defeat invincible sentient machines?
Shepard: Yep.
FS: Why would anyone want that kind of job?
Shepard: I had a crappy guidance councelor.

Shepard: You're not going to try and kill me are you?
Random NPC: No...
[b]Shepard: Oh, good. Because that would be awkward.

Holy crud...at least I know I'm not the only one that watches Supernatural on here.  I started suspectiong at the "the truth-is-out-there" point.

[ObserverStatus]

longtimecoming00 wrote...
Ashley: "You want a piece of me, boy?"

No, no, no. Ashley probably WOULD say that.

[Ashira Shepard]

Kwom Masbag wrote...

Holy crud...at least I know I'm not the only one that watches Supernatural on here.  I started suspectiong at the "the truth-is-out-there" point.

Bah! Found me out!  At least they're amusing; or so I hope.