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[Wolverfrog]

Liara: I'll flay you alive!



...oh, wait.

[Reaper27]

A line a Mass Effect character would never say

Liara: I'll flay you alive. With my mind!

Edit: Wow the guy before me said exactly the same thing lol.

Modifié par Reaper27, 08 avril 2010 - 06:32 .

[Goodwood]

Kasumi: "Hey Shep, wanna get drunk together?"

[Koen Casier]

Dialog that will never happen:
Dialogue in Me3 if Shepard romanced Ashley in Me1 but was unfaithful

Ashley: "You where right along I should never have talked to you like that on Horizon, lets pick things up where we left off"
Shepard: "Sorry Ashley, but after Horizon I found another to love"
Ashley: "I can understand that, so who is she? Little miss perfect or the basement dwelling psycho biker chick?"
Shepard: "No, Ashley it's not them it's Garrus"
Ashley: "Garrus? GARRUS! he is a... he. He is a turian! You know what they did to us in the war!"
Shepard [renegade answer]: "You should know what he does to me in the bedroom"
Garrus: "You know what they say, once you go Palavian..."

Modifié par Koen Casier, 19 avril 2010 - 02:03 .

[jackkel dragon]

Shepard: Intel dropped my balls, sir.
Anderson: They're supposed to drop on their own.

The Illusive Man: Shepard, we have a break.
Shepard: You have the resources we need?
TIM: We're probing Uranus as we speak.
*Shepard reaches down after getting a little worried...*
TIM: Not like that...

Shepard: All right, Gauss.
Garrus: It's Garrus.
Shepard: Fine. Ganus.
Garrus: Garrus.
Shepard: Shut up, Gajani.
Garrus: ...Where the hell did you come up with "Gajani?"

Anderson: "You've been through a lot, Commander.  But there's one more thing you need to take care of..."
Shepard: "I am not screwing Garrus."

[ObserverStatus]

Dakgyenar wrote...
(After Miranda's sex scene)
Miranda: I hate TIM
Shep: Why?
Miranda: Do you remember when I told you I wanted to put a chip in your brain, but Tim didn't allow me?
Shep:Sure
Miranda: Well, that was not the only upgrade I wanted to do to you.

[Reaper27]

Harbinger: RELEASING CONTROL.
Collector General: By the Goddess, that was incredible!

[HighMoon]

Swap Miranda's dialogue with Jack's, Jack's with Miranda's, Samara's with Kasumi's, Kasumi's with Samara's, Mordin's with Jacob's, Jacob's with Mordin's, Tali's with Legion's, Legion's with Tali's, Zaeed's with with Thane's, Thane's with Zaeed's, Garrus' with Grunt's, Grunt's with Garrus's...



PRESTO!

[jackkel dragon]

-Generic -Reaper: Bring out yer dead! *rings bell* Bring out yer dead!
Shepard: I've got one.
Garrus: I'm not dead yet!
Reaper: He says he's not dead yet.
Shepard: He doesn't have much longer.
Garrus: Actually, I think I might pull though!
Reaper: We have the collection again tomorrow...
Shepard: *whispers something*
Garrus: What are you doing?
*Reaper hits Garrus with a bat, checking to make sure no one saw. He tosses the corpse into the cart.*
Shepard: Thank you, friend.

Shepard: He looks like a king. *Looks at turian councilor.*
Kaiden: What makes you say that?
Shepard: He ain't got **** all over him.
Councilor: Ah yes, "****"...

[MasterCommander145]

Shephard: Who's with me on this suicide mission to save the universe?



All the crew of the Normandy SR2 and his/her teammates: YO JOE!

[Reaper27]

Blasto: This one is Blasto, and this is its favourite store on the citadel.

[juxtaposedjoker]

Liara: "Thank you for agreeing to help me take down the Shadow Broker Shepard. Using the resources of Cerberus, the Shadow Brokers only competition, would be much more effective than having you hack some terminals."

TIM: "TIMMAY"

Morinth: "Abstinence is the only way Shepard."

Samara: "Why Shepard, how did you guess that I was a dominatrix before I became a Justicar?"

Shepard to Samara: "Could you recite one of the sutras for me?"
Samara: "What is the sound of one hand clapping?"
Shepard: "THAT is what helps you determine what is and what is not just?"

Samara: "Morinths real name is Lestat."

Jack: "You know Kelly, I could really use some therapy."

Grunt: "I feel pretty! Oh so pretty!"

Benezia as she is dying: "No light...they always said...wait...Alanis? Skee ball?"

Rachni Queen: "Memory all alone in the moonlight."

Ashley speaking to FemShep durring a game that hasn't been modded to reveal the orgional romance options: "Make me."

Miranda: "I'm a very insecure person."

Zaeed: "Now this is a knife."

Tali: "I'm a nudist."

Tali after the Miranda/Shepard romance scene singing: "Smells like sex and candy."


(edits)

Rupert:  "Shepard what can I get ya?"
Femshep: "Coffee.  Black."

Modifié par juxtaposedjoker, 11 avril 2010 - 11:43 .

[JediElderNishmo]

Legion [During the Legion-Tali Feud]: Yo Tali, Imma let you finish, but the Geth census has the greatest desire of knowledge of all tiem!

[Annihilator27]

Grunt "I need a hug battlemaster"

[Mahlerian]

Garrus: Perfect timing, Shepard! You gave me a clear shot at that bastard!

Shepard: You took him down clean.

Garrus: Yeah. It was a heavy risk. But the prize...



Is this getting overdone? Of course, given the context, I think the prize would end up being Dr. Michel... Femshep may have competition...

[scorptatious]

Ashley: I love aliens!

Volus with credit chit: Oh, my mistake. I appoligize for accusing you of stealing Quarian.

Captain Kar'Danna: Welcome to Flotilla dear Geth! Make yourself at home!

[LebatomiBeni]

Mahlerian wrote...

Garrus: Perfect timing, Shepard! You gave me a clear shot at that bastard!
Shepard: You took him down clean.
Garrus: Yeah. It was a heavy risk. But the prize...

Is this getting overdone? Of course, given the context, I think the prize would end up being Dr. Michel... Femshep may have competition...

gmartin40 wrote...

Miranda: Lets have a threesome, you me
and Legion
Shepard: Okay, Legion get in the front.
Legion:
Does not compute
Miranda: Oh for God's sake. Do it to me from
the front side
Legion: Analyzing data
Shepard: C'mon
Legion! Put the Geth Dropship into her Spaceport!!!!

ROFL

[scorptatious]

C-sec customs: Oh no it's a Geth!!!

[i PHaLaN]

Ashley: The alliance is wrong!

Modifié par i PHaLaN, 12 avril 2010 - 06:01 .

[rastakore]

Jacob: Sneaking into the captain's quarters... Low risk. But no prize...

[Whatcote Park]

This: starts at 17 seconds

[DeathJesterr]

TIM: The Omega 4 Relay is the key to the universe. The Relay is will unlock all the endless possibilities of the galaxy in your hands, Sheperd.

Sheperd: Really?

TIM: No, it's just a relay.



Jacob: I think letting Grunt out of the tube was a bad idea, but it is up to you, Commander." *salutes*

Sheperd: *salutes back* "Noted."

Jacob: I think activateing the Geth was a bad idea, but your in charge, Commander." *salutes*

Sheperd: *salutes back* "Noted."

Jacob: "I'll be up in your cabin in five minutes on my knee's, Commander." *Salutes*

Sheperd: *salutes back* "Not--wait, what?"



Miranda: (talking privately to a voice recording diary) "Mordin just posted a warning about the Varren STD that is spreading throughout the ship... hopefully he won't be able to trace it back to me."

Sheperd: (hiding behind the door) "Oh crap... I need to take a shower."



Tali: "I'm going to have to break it off, Sheperd. I just had this new upgrade for my suit i heard about from a Quarian on Illium, I'm really sorry Sheperd."

Sheperd: "Well... huh. At least it won't give you a sinus infection."



Grunt: *notices Sheperd walking into the room, and takes off glasses* "Oh sorry, did you need something Sheperd? I was just in the middle of reading this very interesting piece of literature."

Sheperd: *raises an eyebrow* "You can read? I mean, oh... thats nice, what is it?"

Grunt: "Fornax"

Sheperd: *facepalms*



Garrus: "My nose fell off again, I'm going to need another facial reconstruction surgery..."

Sheperd: "What? Ok, from now on, I'm calling you Michael."

[Steel Dancer]

Jack: Anyone got some warm clothing I could borrow?