989 réponses à ce sujet

[Highdragonslayer]

Reaper27 wrote...

Shepard: Hey, Garrus. I upgraded the med-bay. You've got just enough time to fix your scars before we start the suicide mission.
Garrus: Can it wait a bit? I'm in the middle of some calibrations.
Shepard: Oh come on man, it took me forever to scan all those planets for-
Garrus: Calibrations!

Shepard: See, I told you we could take down the Shadow Broker if you let me help you.
Liara: You were right Shepard. I have no idea what I was thinking.
Shepard: So... you'll come with me now?
Liara: Yes, Shepard. I look forward to it.
Shepard: Sweet. Maybe I can show you my new cabin and we can-
Garrus: Hey, uh guys. I don't mean to interrupt this romanic moment but this cup of coffee you left on the desk for me is revolting.
Shepard:
Garrus: Do you mind if I get myself a glass of water to wash the taste away?
Liara:
Garrus: What? Wasn't I meant to drink that?

I don't get the last one

[ChaobSiroc]

Highdragonslayer wrote...

Reaper27 wrote...

Shepard: Hey, Garrus. I upgraded the med-bay. You've got just enough time to fix your scars before we start the suicide mission.
Garrus: Can it wait a bit? I'm in the middle of some calibrations.
Shepard: Oh come on man, it took me forever to scan all those planets for-
Garrus: Calibrations!

Shepard: See, I told you we could take down the Shadow Broker if you let me help you.
Liara: You were right Shepard. I have no idea what I was thinking.
Shepard: So... you'll come with me now?
Liara: Yes, Shepard. I look forward to it.
Shepard: Sweet. Maybe I can show you my new cabin and we can-
Garrus: Hey, uh guys. I don't mean to interrupt this romanic moment but this cup of coffee you left on the desk for me is revolting.
Shepard:
Garrus: Do you mind if I get myself a glass of water to wash the taste away?
Liara:
Garrus: What? Wasn't I meant to drink that?

I don't get the last one

Liara said she would hit the Shadow Broker with a Biotic field so strong that what was left of him would fit in a cup.... 

[nhsk]

Garrus: I really hate this rifle, give me back my HMWSR

[jackkel dragon]

Saren: *reading ME:Revelation* What! This is libel! I'm calling my lawyer on you, Drew!

Anderson: *reading ME:Revelation* We don't need to advertise my marital status, Drew.

Kahlee: *reading ME:Ascension* What the hell? Drew, that was a private moment!

Greyson: *During meeting with the Illusive Man in Ascension flashback* I know you're going to cause trouble, so I'm going to be preemptive. *shoots the Illusive Man*

Shepard: You touched my tra-la-la.

[Purple0limar]

Nihlus: I won't really need your help, but I'd appreciate it if you watched my back.

[kennyv217]

Zaeed: Shepard, I'm taking my shore leave to go for pizza and a movie with Vido!



Kasumi: *returns "borrowed" item*



Jacob: *dosen't salute*

[jwalker]

apotheosic wrote...

Legion: Commander-Shepard.

This !

[jackkel dragon]

Ashley: Hey Garrus, would you like to meet me in my bunk?
Garrus: What would we do there?
Ashley: Oh... you know...
Garrus: I'm not sure I follow...
Ashley: We can "relieve stress" before our mission...
Garrus: Oh! Now I get it. I'll meet you there.
------
Chakwas: Ashley, I understand you are finally getting friendly with aliens.
Ashley: You could say that...
Chakwas: I have one piece of advice.
Ashley: What's that?
Chakwas: Do not ingest.

[Kikaimegami]

Shepard: So, why my N7 armor?

Legion: There was a hole.

Shepard: But why part of my armor? Why not something else?

Legion: ....We want to be close to you.. always. *starts creeping closer*

Shepard: *starts backpedaling* I should go.

[Armannen]

Garrus: Commander, I think I've found Sidonis. He's on the Citade-
Shepard: It will have to wait for a bit. I'm... in the middle of some calibrations.[smilie]../../../images/forum/emoticons/cool.png[/smilie]
Garrus: <_<

[battlechantress]

Kaidan/Ashley (on Horizon): How could you do that to us?! You didn't even try to call collect! Oh... right, dead or in a coma for the last two years. I could see how that would pose a problem. *pause* Please tell Garrus to put his gun down.



Legion (about the armor): Look, I didn't have time to scan the latest armor models from 'Guns and Armor' magazine, all right?

[Blk_Mage_Ctype]

Shepard: "Uh...Liara, I think I may've just met your father..."



Liara: "Really?! What's she like? I'll bet you she's something incredible like a Justicar!"



Shepard: *nervous laugh* "Uh, yeah... She's something alright..."



Liara: "Well don't leave me in suspense, Shepard! What's she like?"



Shepard: "Uh, well... She's a bartender named Atheda who lives right here on the station. Her dad was a Krogan, and her mom fought in the Krogan Wars."



Liara: "A...bartender?"



Shepard: "Yeah... And she also offered to sleep with me on the counter, but she decided against it since she just cleaned it...probably after the last guy she slept with...who may or may not have been Conrad Verner."



Liara: "..."



Shepard: "Well...I reckoned I better be hittin' the old dusty trail..."



*walks towards the door*



Liara: "Shepard, wait!"



*Shepard stops right outside the door*



Shepard: "Yeah...?"



Liara: You...wouldn't have slept with her...would you?"



Shepard: "Of course not... I need a sweet, sensitive, loving, and supportive woman..."



Liara: "Whew, that's a load off my mind..."



Shepard: "Which is why I've chosen Tali, Kthnxbai!"



*closes door*

[kglaser]

Armannen wrote...

Garrus: Commander, I think I've found Sidonis. He's on the Citade-
Shepard: It will have to wait for a bit. I'm... in the middle of some calibrations.[smilie]../../../images/forum/emoticons/cool.png[/smilie]
Garrus: <_<

classIC! :happy:

Modifié par kglaser, 09 mai 2010 - 09:34 .

[Cra5y Pineapple]

Turian Concillor: Ah Yes, "the Concil."

Wrex: We should stop killing innocent civilians.

Morlan: YOUR 2 BIG!

Leigon: Human movie, Evan Almighty, scene 12, Thou Shalt....
Do the dance *robot*

[jackkel dragon]

Shepard: Thane, what is that you're...
Thane: Meditations!

Shepard: Um... Thane? Samara? Why are you... Do I even want to know?
Thane: Our meditations are... more focused this way.
Samara: Yes. Meditations.

Shepard: Whaddya doing, Garrus?
Garrus: Gah! Calibrating! Get out!

Shepard: Work, huh?
Miranda: Yes, work.
Shepard: You don't work anymore. You quit Cerberus.
Miranda: ...I'm catching up on work.
Jack: Is she gone yet?
Shepard: I'm leaving now...

Grunt: Heh heh heh...
Shepard: Grunt? What did you just shove into your tank?
Grunt: Nothing. I'm just seeing if... I can imprint something. Right. Imprints.
Shepard: Okay...
------
Shepard: Where's Tali?
Donnely: I thought she was with Grunt.

Shepard: Hey Jacob, my man! How's it swinging?
Jacob: Get under the table, now!
Shepard: Who are you talking to?
Jacob: No one. What did you say?
-------
Kasumi: "Get under the table?" I should have just cloaked...
Shepard: Why are you on the command deck, Kasumi?
Kasumi: ...I needed to check something.

Zaeed: Let's see if the old gun still works...
Shepard: Tell me that's not what you just said.
Zaeed: *holds up his ancient weapon* I'm talking about this. Dirt mind.

Mordin: Take this. Should improve sensations of the organic partner.
Legion: We thank you for your assistance.
Shepard: What was that about.
Legion: We have reached consensus that Kelly is attractive and that we should "get it on" with her.
Shepard: ...I'm leaving.

Shepard: Hey, Joker. You would not believe what I've seen and heard today...
Joker: Shh!!!
EDI: Jeff is watching "vids" of organic... rituals.
Shepard: You have to be kidding me.
Joker: Don't be all "I'm holier that you!" I mean, look at these! This makes Fleet and Flotilla look tame.
Shepard: Right...
Joker: Just watch this next one. I've been saving this.
Shepard: Okay... wait a minute... Dr. Chakwas?!
Joker: My eyes!
EDI: Purging optical memory databases permanently.

[Panda Warlock]

Harbinger: Screw that. Scratch human project. We're making hanar Reaper now.

[Lilitv]

kglaser wrote...

Armannen wrote...

Garrus: Commander, I think I've found Sidonis. He's on the Citade-
Shepard: It will have to wait for a bit. I'm... in the middle of some calibrations.../../../images/forum/emoticons/cool.png
Garrus: <_<

classIC! :happy:

Take that, Garrus!

[nhsk]

TIM: The first human to take a ship through... and survive.

Shepard: I've got room on the Normandy if you're that eager to see it.

TIM: Hold at relay, I'll prepare my shuttle.

[Cra5y Pineapple]

Aria: My one rule? Don't f**k Aria.
Shepard: Don't you mean don't f**k with Aria?
Aria: No seriously, you've probably caught scale itch from Kelly.

[Armannen]

Garrus: "Chambers, the commander keeps mocking me. I've found Sidonis, but he's all 'CALIBRATIONS, GARRUS'"
Kelly: "Well, what did you do when Shepard wanted to talk about you?"
Garrus: "Um..."
Kelly: "Yes, he did tell me about that. He felt really depressed. Like if you valued those calibrations more than him. Seriously, why did you do that to him? You're a monster, Garrus."
Garrus: "...I should go."

[jackkel dragon]

Armannen wrote...

Garrus: "Chambers, the commander keeps mocking me. I've found Sidonis, but he's all 'CALIBRATIONS, GARRUS'"
Kelly: "Well, what did you do when Shepard wanted to talk about you?"
Garrus: "Um..."
Kelly: "Yes, he did tell me about that. He felt really depressed. Like if you valued those calibrations more than him. Seriously, why did you do that to him? You're a monster, Garrus."
Garrus: "...I should go."

Wonderful.
Stealing your idea:

Tali: Kelly? I tried to tell Shepard about my feelings for him today, but he just dismissed me. Something about engines needing cleaning.
Kelly: What did you say to him the last time you talked?

Jack: Kelly. Where the hell is Shepard? I haven't seen him in weeks.
Kelly: He said that you told him to "**** off."
Jack: ****.

*----------------------------*

Joker: Like you'd remember how to fly a ship like this.
Thane: Drell have perfect memories.
Joker: Oh yeah? Try it.
---
EDI: Multiple hull breaches. Life support offline. Crash zone: unidentified. Hostiles are en route.
Joker: I thought you said you had perfect memory!
Thane: I do. I remembered when I crashed a shuttle because I was "getting it on" with my wife.
Shepard: All right, who's the wiseass who decided to crash the ship?

[Armannen]

Citadel Souvenirs speakers: "I'm commander Shepard, and I'm not sure if I like this store or not. I mean, sure, the goods are pretty nice, but whenever they malfunction, the customer support is never online. It is really annoying. But I guess the originality of the stuff they're selling might make up for that. The extranet site could use a more userfriendly design. Like, sure, the stores graphic designers did one hell of a job, but what good is it if no one really understands it? Furthermore, this Blasto action figure i bought for my niece doesn't seem to...

[Asari merchant]: That will do, Commander, here's your discount

[Shepard]: But i wasn't fini-

[Asari merchant]: THANK YOU, COMMANDER."

[jackkel dragon]

---TalixGarrus---

Tali: Hey Garrus, can you help me with these engines?
Garrus: Can it wait for a bit? I'm in the middle of some calibrations.

Garrus: Hey Tali, can you help me with these calibrations?
Tali: I have to clean up this engine. Maybe later?

Tali: Garrus, I need--
Garrus: Get back to your engine. Doesn't it need cleaning or something?
Tali: *walks away with message from the Migrant Fleet*

Garrus: Hey, Tali! I found--
Tali: Calibrations, Garrus! Get back to them!
Garrus: But--
Tali: Calibrations!
Garrus: *walks away with info on Sidonis*

Tali: Hey Garrus, my trial--
Garrus: Get back to your damn engines, Tali.

Garrus: Tali! I met Sidonis and--
Tali: Get back to the calibrations, bosh'tet!

Kelly: Let's see if they take the bait.
Shepard: Right. *opens comm* Garrus, Tali. Your presence is required on the CIC.

*in the elevator...*
Garrus: Is that engine clean yet?
Tali: No. Are the calibrations done yet?
Garrus: No.
*akward silence*

Shepard: Good. Now that you're here, we can all get down to the crew deck.
Garrus: I was just there!
Kelly: Shh!

*back in the elevator*
Garrus: *grumbles*
Shepard: Shut it, Garrus.
Tali: Not all of us live in the main gun, Garrus.
Garrus: Not all of us live in the engines.
Kelly: *smiles*

Garrus: What the hell is this? Candles? Plates? What are you...
Shepard: Sit down Garrus. That's an order. Tali, sit on this side.
Tali: Okay...
Kelly: Hurry up, Gardner!
Gardner: I'm coming. Here's the food...
Tali: I can't eat this without removing my helmet. I get sick when I remove my-- Oww!
Mordin: Powerful anti-viral and anti-bacterial. Very useful for short-term effects on quarians.
Shepard: Just in time, Mordin.
Mordin: Happy to help.

Garrus: What's this all about?
Shepard: Don't worry about it. Just enjoy yourselves.
*Everyone except Garrus and Tali leave. Kelly tries to peek through the Med Lab window until it's shut in her face*

Garrus: So... how's the engine coming?
Tali: I think I almost got the first one clean.
Garrus: Cool. Um... this may be akward for you, but... do all quarians look like you?
Tali: Have you seen any other quarians without helmets?
Garrus: Point taken.

Tali: How are those calibrations coming along?
Garrus: I think the left gun is almost ready to fire straight. The right gun is still a little off, though.
Tali: It must be difficult to align them perfectly.
Garrus: Balancing is a ****.

*Tali and Garrus are drunk with dextro-amino equivalents of alcohol*
Tali: And so I left the trial thinking that Zaal'Korris was an idiot.
Garrus: Nice move on Veetor, though. *hic*
Tali: Yeah...
Garrus: Did I tell you about Sid-- *hic* --Sidonis yet?
Tali: No... *hic* Tell me...

Garrus: Then I got back in the cab and flew back to the ward.
Tali: You certainly *hic* put... put Harkin... in his place...
Garrus: Yeah... *hic* Yeah I did...
*Both of them pass out*

*later...*
Tali: Wanna help with the engine?
Garrus: Wanna help with the calibrations?
Tali + Garrus: Sure.
Kelly: Kodak moment!
Shepard: Get the hell out of the picture, Kelly!

[Jack Package]

Shepard wants to visit Garrus for a little chat.
...enters Main Battery Room.
There is Garrus, but there is also a quarian girl.

Valley girl quarian: Oh yeah, standard equipment for every responsible adult. Here, let me fire it up...

Shepard:

Valley girl quarian: Uh, excuse us human? We are in the middle of some ca-lib-ray-chuns.. Ugh...

Shepard: What the....<_<

Garrus: A little space please, commander?

Modifié par Jack Package, 15 mai 2010 - 05:48 .

[Ooga600]

Harbinger: On second thought, let us not go to The Milky Way. It is a silly place.

Modifié par Ooga600, 16 mai 2010 - 05:29 .