Personally I don't think Femsheps are at a disadvantage overall. It's just that we have no F/F romance, but that would put Malesheps at exactly the same disadvantage, since there is no M/M either. And yeah, we can cuddle with Kelly. I kind of wish she were an actual LI, since the female LIs besides Tali are kind of bland as well.
If we take a look at the romance options:
1.) Tali. Since no one knows what she looks like, all you have is her personality and voice. I personally find both extremely appealing. Yes, she is a geek, and yes, she is sort of awkward. But compared to Miranda and especially Jack, she is very mature and "grown-up" about it. I especially loved her quote about how she could make any piece of scrap metal do precision jumps. She's confident in her abilities. She's even sassy at times. Plus I loved the story about her and her distant father. Unlike Miranda, she didn't make an issue about it. Of course she was mourning his death, who wouldn't? Plus it's pretty safe to say anyone would be caught in a moral dilemma if you found out your father was conducting experiments that could put the entire human species at risk.. Loved the line about how her father would enjoy her mourning over him by blowing up a lot of Geth heh... For me, Tali is just about the perfect girl. Of course, others might have adifferent view on it.
2.) Miranda. Kind of bland. "Perfect" gengineered woman, but too insecure to actually make any use of it. TIM as new father figure since her fallout with her actual dad. Later in the game Shepard as new father figure. Predictable, and... well, sort of uninteresting. I'm really not into girls who constantly bore me with their trivial issues. Her concern for her sister actually was refreshing, since those actually WERE real problems that needed taking care of, but after that she fell back into the whole "boohoo, I'm perfect, but I screw everything up because I never had a father" routine. Can't say I hate her, but she's just not interesting, neither as a friend nor as a LI.
3.) Jack... well. I'm not into angst-filled teenage emos either. And that's basically what she is. She's just as insecure as Miranda, but instead ofgoing for the "perfect and infallible" facade, she puts on an "OMG I IZ DANGEROUS B*TCH!" facade. Unless Miranda, she can't even be befriended, making her character for Femsheps even more shallow and uninteresting than Miranda's, if such a thing is actually possible. If she's back in ME3 I really hope she finally grows up and leaves her angst behind. I'd rate her as the single most uninteresting LI available. Probably because I'm more into girls who are upfront about their problems and are willing to resolve them, rather than dwell on them.
4.) Jacob. Slightly more interesting than a lampshade. I usually have less interaction with him than with the weapons loadout thingy next to him. I don't know where BioWare went wrong with him. I guess they just tried too hard. Could've been a really cool LI/friend option, but somehow someone screwed up.
5.) Thane. The obvious knight in shining armour. Yeah, he's an assassin, but he only kills bad guys. He's dangerous, badass, but also very spiritual and just. I can definitely see the appeal here, but it just isn't my thing.
6.) Garrus... the Turian vigilante. Basically Batman in space. Now Garrus is an LI I actually like. He's strong, got his own mind and opinions (and cannot be talked out of assassinating Sidonis unlike other crewmates who can be coerced into doing whatever you want them to) and isn't afraid to admit that he's not perfect. Overall I think he does have a very strong personality, and if I would romance any male crewmate at all, it would easily be Garrus. Because he's just that awesome
Overall, from my PoV Femsheps do in fact have an advantage over Malesheps in terms of LIs. Femsheps get Garrus and Thane. Malesheps only have Tali. Yes, I would love to have a bi option. But sexual orientation doesn't have anything to do with gender. You might as well start a thread about how Malesheps are at a disadvantage because you cannot romance Thane. It's just as incorrect as this thread.
Note that I'm all for having same sex romances (for obvious reasons), but I personally find the Femshep romances to be far more interesting overall than the Maleshep romances.